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Definition of guilt-trip

 (Entry 1 of 2)

transitive verb

Definition of guilt trip  (Entry 2 of 2)

Examples of guilt-trip in a Sentence

These examples are programmatically compiled from various online sources to illustrate current usage of the word 'guilt-trip.' Any opinions expressed in the examples do not represent those of Merriam-Webster or its editors. Send us feedback about these examples.

Word History

1974, in the meaning defined above

1970, in the meaning defined above

Dictionary Entries Near guilt-trip

Cite this entry.

“Guilt-trip.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary , Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/guilt-trip. Accessed 29 May. 2024.

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What Is Guilt Tripping?

Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

damircudic / Getty Images

• Getting Help

Frequently Asked Questions

A guilt trip means causing another person to feel guilt or a sense of responsibility to change their behavior or take a specific action. Because guilt can be such a powerful motivator of human behavior, people can wield it as a tool to change how others think, feel, and behave. 

Sometimes this might involve leaning on something that someone already feels guilty about. In other cases, people might induce feelings of unjustified guilt or responsibility to manipulate the other person's emotions and behaviors.

If someone has ever made you feel bad about something you’ve done (or didn’t do) and then used those bad feelings to get you to do something for them, then you have experience with guilt tripping.

This article discusses the signs, types, and impact of guilt trips. It also covers some of the steps you can take to cope with this type of behavior.

Signs of a Guilt Trip

Guilt trips can be intentional, but they can also be unintentional. There are chances that you have even guilt-tripped people into doing things before.

Sometimes guilt tripping behavior can be easy to spot, but it can also be much more subtle and difficult to detect.  Some key signs that others may be guilt-tripping you include:

• Making comments suggesting that you have not done as much work as they have done
• Bringing up mistakes that you have made in the past
• Reminding you of favors they have performed for you in the past
• Acting as if they are angry but then denying that there is a problem
• Refusing to speak to you or giving you the silent treatment
• Making it clear through their body language , tone of voice, and facial expressions that they disapprove of what you were doing
• Suggesting that you “owe” them
• Engaging in passive-aggressive behavior
• Making sarcastic comments about your efforts or progress

It is important to note that this type of indirect communication can occur in any interpersonal relationship. Still, it is more likely to take place in relationships that are marked by close emotional connections.

It can show up in romantic relationships, but guilt trips may also be utilized in family relationships, parental relationships, and even work relationships.

Types of Guilt Tripping

There are many different types of guilt trips that people may utilize depending on the ultimate goal or purpose of the behavior. Some of the different purposes of a guilt trip include:

• Manipulation : Sometimes, the primary goal of a guilt trip is to manipulate someone into doing something that they normally would not want to do.  
• Conflict avoidance : In other cases, people may use guilt trips to avoid directly talking about an issue. It allows them to get what they want without having to engage in direct conflict.
• Moral education : Guilt trips can also be a way of getting someone to engage in a behavior that the individual feels is more moral or “right.”
• Elicit sympathy : In some cases, guilt-tripping allows the individual to gain the sympathy of others by casting themselves in the role of someone who has been harmed by the actions the other person is supposed to feel guilty about.

Guilt isn't always a bad thing. While often troubling and unpleasant, it can serve an important role in guiding moral behavior. When people experience guilt, they can fix their mistakes and avoid repeating the same errors in the future.

Researcher Courtney Humeny

A guilt trip does not appear to induce the benefits of guilt, such as making amends, honesty, and mutual understanding.

Impact of Guilt Trips

Invoking feelings of guilt to change someone’s behavior can have a wide variety of effects. Whether guilt is wielded intentionally or not, it prevents healthy communication and connections with others. Some of the most immediate effects of this form of covert psychological manipulation include:

Damage to Relationships

Research suggests that guilt trips can take a toll on close relationships. One study found that people hurt by their partner's criticism were more likely to use those hurt feelings to make their partner feel guilty and offer reassurances.

However, the study also found that the partner who had been guilt-tripped into offering assurances was more likely to feel significantly worse about the relationship.

In other words, inducing feelings of guilt may work to get your partner to do what you want—but it comes at a cost. It can impair trust and cause the other person to feel that they are being manipulated. 

One of the reasons why guilt trips can poison relationships is because they can lead to lasting feelings of resentment.

"A guilt trip imposes aversive states associated with guilt, along with feelings of resentment from feeling manipulated," Humeny suggests.

A single occasion of someone using a guilt trip to alter your behavior might not have a serious impact on your relationship. Repeated use of guilt trips can leave you feeling bitter.

If you feel that your partner is always going to guilt you into something that you don't want to do, it can decrease intimacy, reduce emotional closeness, and ultimately make you start to resent your partner.

Research suggests that appeals to guilt are a common type of persuasion technique . However, while guilt can compel people to take certain actions, it can also sometimes backfire.

Low-level guilt tends to motivate people to act on the persuasive message. High levels of guilt, however, often fail due to what researchers call "reactance." 

"An individual in a state of reactance will behave in such a way as to restore his freedom (or, at least, his sense of freedom), for example, by performing behaviors that are contrary to those required," explain researchers Aurélien Graton and Melody Mailliez in a 2019 article published in the journal Behavioral Sciences .

In other words, guilt trips can backfire and lead people to behave opposite how someone else wants them to act. For example, someone guilt-tripping you into calling them more often might actually result in calling them less.

Poor Well-being

Feelings of excessive guilt are associated with several mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression , and obsessive-compulsive disorder . Being subjected to guilt trips may contribute to the development or worsening of such conditions.

Experiencing guilt can also lead to many immediate and unpleasant emotions and symptoms such as anxiety, sadness, regret, worry, muscle tension, and insomnia.

This type of covert manipulation may also sometimes contribute to the development of a guilt complex , which is a persistent belief that you have done (or will do) something wrong.

Over time, guilt can lead to feelings of shame. Shame can affect your self-image, which can then contribute to social withdrawal and isolation.

How to Cope With Guilt Tripping

There are a number of tactics that can be helpful when dealing with a guilt trip. Some steps you can take include:

• Acknowledge the request. Let them know that you understand that it is important to them. Responding with empathy and showing that you see their needs may help them feel that they are not simply being ignored. Validating their emotions may help lessen the intensity of those feelings.
• Share your feelings . Explain that you also see how they are trying to make you feel guilty so that you'll do what they want. Then tell them how that type of manipulation makes you feel. Suggest that interacting in that way will lead to resentment and that more direct communication forms would be more effective. 
• Set boundaries . Boundaries help set limits on what you will and will not accept. Even if you do end up helping them with their request, make sure you clearly articulate your limits and explain the consequences of crossing those boundaries. Then be sure that you enforce those limits if they are crossed.

Other things that you can use include protecting your self-esteem and distancing yourself if needed. You're more likely to fall for a guilt trip if you already feel poorly about yourself, so find strategies to build up your sense of self-worth. 

If the other person keeps trying to manipulate you with feelings of guilt, reduce your communication with them or even consider ending the relationship.

Protecting your own well-being should be a top priority. A person who tries to manipulate you with toxic feelings of shame and guilt does not have your best interests at heart.

Getting Help for Guilt

If you are experiencing feelings of guilt or related symptoms of anxiety, stress, or depression, talk to your health care provider or a mental health professional. They can recommend treatment options such as psychotherapy or medications that can help manage symptoms and improve the quality of your life.

Your doctor or therapist may suggest a type of therapy called cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) , which may help reduce inappropriate guilt feelings. This type of therapy can help you identify and change the negative thoughts and cognitive distortions that can contribute to feelings of guilt.

Your therapist can also help you learn to recognize the signs of a guilt trip—and help you practice strategies to cope with this type of emotional manipulation.

An example of guilt tripping might be your friend calling you and saying, "I know you are too busy with work to hang out. I'll just spend the evening by myself. I just thought that since I helped you get that job you would make sure to make a little more time for me." This type of comment is designed to induce feelings of guilt and bring up the idea that you "owe" them in some way.

Guilt tripping is often designed to manipulate other people by preying on their emotions and feelings of guilt or responsibility. This can be a form of toxic behavior that can have detrimental effects on a person's well-being as well as their relationships.

While both behaviors are destructive and toxic, they differ in key ways. Gaslighting is a type of emotional abuse that involves denying another person's reality and making them question their own experiences. Guilt tripping, on the other hand, is about causing another person to feel guilty in order to get them to change their behavior.

Humeny C. A qualitative investigation of a guilt trip . Conference: Institute of Cognitive Science Spring Proceedings.

Overall NC, Girme YU, Lemay EP Jr, Hammond MD. Attachment anxiety and reactions to relationship threat: the benefits and costs of inducing guilt in romantic partners . J Pers Soc Psychol . 2014;106(2):235-56. doi:10.1037/a0034371

Aurélien G, Melody M. A theory of guilt appeals: a review showing the importance of investigating cognitive processes as mediators between emotion and behavior .  Behav Sci (Basel) . 2019;9(12):117. doi:10.3390/bs9120117

Tilghman-Osborne C, Cole DA, Felton JW.  Definition and measurement of guilt: Implications for clinical research and practice .  Clin Psychol Rev . 2010;30(5):536-546. doi:10.1016/j.cpr.2010.03.007

Miceli M, Castelfranchi C.  Reconsidering the differences between shame and guilt .  Eur J Psychol . 2018;14(3):710-733. doi:10.5964/ejop.v14i3.1564

Herr NR, Jones AC, Cohn DM, Weber DM.  The impact of validation and invalidation on aggression in individuals with emotion regulation difficulties .  Personal Disord . 2015;6(4):310-4. doi:10.1037/per0000129

Cleantis T. Boundaries and self-care . Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.

Hedman E, Ström P, Stünkel A, Mörtberg E. Shame and guilt in social anxiety disorder: effects of cognitive behavior therapy and association with social anxiety and depressive symptoms . PLoS One . 2013;8(4):e61713. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0061713

Johnson VE, Nadal KL, Sissoko DRG, King R. "It's not in your head": Gaslighting, 'splaining, victim blaming, and other harmful reactions to microaggressions .  Perspect Psychol Sci . 2021;16(5):1024-1036. doi:10.1177/17456916211011963

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

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guilt trip noun

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What does the noun guilt trip mean?

There is one meaning in OED's entry for the noun guilt trip . See ‘Meaning & use’ for definition, usage, and quotation evidence.

How common is the noun guilt trip ?

How is the noun guilt trip pronounced, british english, u.s. english, where does the noun guilt trip come from.

Earliest known use

The earliest known use of the noun guilt trip is in the 1970s.

OED's earliest evidence for guilt trip is from 1972, in the writing of J. Rossner.

guilt trip is formed within English, by compounding.

Etymons: guilt n. , trip n. 1

Nearby entries

• guilter, n. a1300–82
• guiltful, adj. 1655–1791
• guiltfully, adv. c1480
• guiltily, adv. 1597–
• guiltiness, n. c1480–
• guilting, adj. Old English–1382
• guiltist, n. 1693
• guiltless, adj. c1175–
• guiltlessly, adv. 1548–
• guiltlessness, n. 1571–
• guilt trip, n. 1972–
• guilt-trip, v. 1977–
• guiltwite, n. Old English–1706
• guilty, adj. Old English–
• guilty knowledge, n. 1800–
• guiltyship, n. 1557
• guily, adj. c1430–1530
• guimauve, n. 1812–
• guimbard, n. 1830–
• guimpe, n. 1688–
• guindall, n. 1628

Meaning & use

I want to make it clear that nobody's sending me on any guilt trip over my money.

You start laying guilt trips on me and I don't need it, okay?

Mum, don't lay a guilt trip on us.

Ever the master of the guilt-trip , he finally said, ‘And this is how you kids repay me?’

Everyone in my family has a tendency toward manipulative behavior, but it's going beyond that. I can't begin to describe the guilt trip each one separately is laying on me!

• guilt 1567– An unpleasant feeling of having committed wrong or failed in an obligation; a guilty feeling.
• guilt trip 1972– An episode of severe, often excessive or unjustified self-reproach, esp. one deliberately provoked by another person; a state of mind in which a…
• self-condemnation 1591– The action of blaming oneself for something.
• self-accusing 1602– The action or an act of accusing oneself.
• self-reproving 1608– The action or an act of reproving oneself; (a) self-reproof.
• self-accusation 1616– The action of accusing oneself; an accusation made against oneself.
• self-reproof a1631– Reproof or censure of oneself; (severe) self-reproach. Also (and in earliest use): an instance of this; a reproving thought or utterance about…
• self-reflection 1656–1844 A critical or reproachful thought about oneself. Cf. reflection , n. II.9. Obsolete .
• self-reproach 1683– The action or fact of reproaching or blaming oneself; reproach directed towards oneself. Also (and in earliest use): an instance of this; a…
• self-reproachment 1802– The action or fact of reproaching or blaming oneself; self-reproach.
• self-reproval 1823– Reproval or censure of oneself; an instance of this; = self-reproof , n.
• self-reproachingness 1850–

Pronunciation

• ð th ee
• ɬ rhingy ll

Some consonants can take the function of the vowel in unstressed syllables. Where necessary, a syllabic marker diacritic is used, hence <petal> /ˈpɛtl/ but <petally> /ˈpɛtl̩i/.

• a trap, bath
• ɑː start, palm, bath
• ɔː thought, force
• ᵻ (/ɪ/-/ə/)
• ᵿ (/ʊ/-/ə/)

Other symbols

• The symbol ˈ at the beginning of a syllable indicates that that syllable is pronounced with primary stress.
• The symbol ˌ at the beginning of a syllable indicates that that syllable is pronounced with secondary stress.
• Round brackets ( ) in a transcription indicate that the symbol within the brackets is optional.

View the pronunciation model here .

* /d/ also represents a 'tapped' /t/ as in <bitter>

Some consonants can take the function of the vowel in unstressed syllables. Where necessary, a syllabic marker diacritic is used, hence <petal> /ˈpɛd(ə)l/ but <petally> /ˈpɛdl̩i/.

• i fleece, happ y
• æ trap, bath
• ɑ lot, palm, cloth, thought
• ɔ cloth, thought
• ɔr north, force
• ə strut, comm a
• ər nurse, lett er
• ɛ(ə)r square
• æ̃ sal on

Simple Text Respell

Simple text respell breaks words into syllables, separated by a hyphen. The syllable which carries the primary stress is written in capital letters. This key covers both British and U.S. English Simple Text Respell.

b, d, f, h, k, l, m, n, p, r, s, t, v, w and z have their standard English values

• arr carry (British only)
• a(ng) gratin
• o lot (British only)
• orr sorry (British only)
• o(ng) salon

guilt trip typically occurs about 0.07 times per million words in modern written English.

guilt trip is in frequency band 3, which contains words occurring between 0.01 and 0.1 times per million words in modern written English. More about OED's frequency bands

Frequency of guilt trip, n. , 1970–2010

* Occurrences per million words in written English

Historical frequency series are derived from Google Books Ngrams (version 2), a data set based on the Google Books corpus of several million books printed in English between 1500 and 2010.

The overall frequency for a given word is calculated by summing frequencies for the main form of the word, any plural or inflected forms, and any major spelling variations.

For sets of homographs (distinct entries that share the same word-form, e.g. mole , n.¹, mole , n.², mole , n.³, etc.), we have estimated the frequency of each homograph entry as a fraction of the total Ngrams frequency for the word-form. This may result in inaccuracies.

Smoothing has been applied to series for lower-frequency words, using a moving-average algorithm. This reduces short-term fluctuations, which may be produced by variability in the content of the Google Books corpus.

Compounds & derived words

• guilt-trip , v. 1977– transitive. To instil or attempt to instil feelings of guilt or remorse in (a person), often in order to induce him or her into a particular course…

Entry history for guilt trip, n.

guilt trip, n. was first published in September 2001.

guilt trip, n. was last modified in July 2023.

oed.com is a living text, updated every three months. Modifications may include:

• further revisions to definitions, pronunciation, etymology, headwords, variant spellings, quotations, and dates;
• new senses, phrases, and quotations.

Revisions and additions of this kind were last incorporated into guilt trip, n. in July 2023.

Please submit your feedback for guilt trip, n.

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Citation details

Factsheet for guilt trip, n., browse entry.

English-grammar-lessons .co.uk

What Does "Guilt Trip" Mean?

Examples in sentences.

• She laid a guilt trip on him for forgetting their anniversary, making him feel truly sorry.
• Using a guilt trip to convince someone to do a favour is not a healthy way to maintain a relationship.
• He tried to avoid his mother's guilt trips by consistently staying in touch and fulfilling his family obligations.

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Guilt Trip: What Is It, Examples + How to Spot and Respond

Guilt can be a powerful weapon, and sadly, many people know how to utilize it skillfully.

Intentional or not, guilt-tripping prevents conflict resolution and healthy communication and it often evokes feelings of resentment and frustration.

But what is a guilt trip? How do we spot and respond to it? Here are experts insights.

Table of Contents

Guilt trip when someone emotionally punishes you in another way in an effort to get you to do something

Assess your intent, learn to say ‘no’, guilt trips are an attempt to manipulate you, prepare yourself by recognizing guilt trips, stop enabling bad behavior, attempting to make another person feel guilty is a problematic behavior, stick to your boundaries, frequently asked questions.

Ned Presnall, LCSW

Licensed Clinical Social Worker | Director of Clinical Services, Plan Your Recovery | Professor, Washington University

As human beings, we are very social creatures. We’re constantly engaged in positively and negatively reinforcing the behaviors of the people closest to us. We give small emotional rewards, and small emotional punishments in response to the things that they do.

We do this because we’re unconsciously trying to reinforce the behaviors that we most want to see — we do this with really anyone we’re invested in, be it a friend, a family member, a co-worker, or a group project member.

Guilt is an emotion that we feel when we think we’ve done something that will cause another person to reject us — Freud called guilt a fear of the loss of love. So if a person is giving us a “guilt trip”, they’re pushing us away to try to reinforce the behavior in us that they want to see. It’s sometimes intentional, and other times unintentional.

For example, if a friend is trying to get you to visit them and you initially refuse, they might guilt trip you by saying, “aww, but you never see me anymore!” That friend might be unconsciously trying to manipulate you, or they may have chosen those words very specifically.

You can recognize a guilt trip when someone withdraws their affection or emotionally punishes you in another way in an effort to get you to do something. It’s a sort of passive-aggressive way to express emotional needs — it’s far better to tell a person what you want than to try to motivate them through manipulation.

Related: How to Stop Being Passive Aggressive

So what can you do? If a person is withdrawing their affection from us, the most practical thing to do is to ask them if they’re unhappy, or otherwise try to communicate with them about their feelings.

Engage them in empathetic conversation, and attempt to see the situation through their eyes when speaking with them — you’ll be more likely to find a solution.

Candace V. Love, PhD, PC

Licensed Clinical Psychologist | President, North Shore Behavioral Medicine

The point I want to make about guilt is simply: We tend to feel guilty when we say ‘no’ to someone or their request. It’s important to know how to say no and not feel guilty for taking care of yourself, even if you just wanted to stay home and watch TV or relax. Yet, too often we beat ourselves up and feel we shouldn’t have said no, and now this other person is disappointed or hurt.

But, when one feels guilty they need to first ask themselves, ‘what was my intent?’ If your intent was not to hurt or disappoint someone, but actually to take care of yourself, then you have nothing to feel guilty about.

Sure, the other person may be hurt and feel disappointed but that is their issue to work out. That person needs to learn to self soothe themselves, which is a skill everyone should learn along with frustration tolerance. Unfortunately, many people have not learned these skills.

Too often guilt accompanies those people with people-pleasing issues – the disease to please – or another word for it co-dependent: where you put other people’s wants and needs ahead of your own.

Someone who does this is ripe for a narcissistic relationship because a narcissist is only too happy to have someone who puts the narcissist’s wants and needs always first.

Mary Joye, LMHC

Licensed Mental Health Counselor,  Winter Haven Counseling

Guilt trips are some of the most costly “excursions” you can take because they take a toll on you mentally and physically. If you feel guilty when someone asks you for something, this is the most obvious way to recognize if it is a guilt trip. When you recognize something, you can neutralize the effect with time and practice.

When someone uses guilt, it feels like emotional extortion and it is. This is particularly true of anyone who suffers from codependency, approval-seeking, or people-pleasing behaviors.

Related: How to Break Codependency Habits

Recognizing the guilt trip may have been elusive in the past, but it is easier than you think to in the future. There is biology to this and involves the vagus nerve which is your parasympathetic nervous system that kicks in when you are emotionally reactive.

If you see your phone ring knowing it is someone who guilt trips you, feeling the tension in your shoulder or neck, heart racing, feeling short of breath or nauseated, are vagus nerve reactions.

Guilt can be the most insidious of manipulation tools of narcissists or just plain selfish people who use your kindness and empathy to gain your sympathy. They get you to say yes when you want to say no. Saying no is very difficult but it can be done.

You can diplomatically say no in a three step way.

• Breathe slowly and don’t feel that you have to say yes or no right away. Take your time to leave silence. It lets them know you are thinking and not reacting in knee jerk fashion.
• Release the tension you feel and use a “gratitude sandwich” to say no. Example: Someone has called and said no one makes cakes as well as you do and no one is as nice as you are and asks you to bake ten cakes for their cause without payment other than this passive-aggressive compliment which was really flattery. You can say. “Thank you for thinking I can bake ten cakes for the benefit but I am overextended and will have to decline. But thank you for the compliment. This method is an authentic way to say no without having to say “no” at all.
• If the person pushes harder, you can straighten your posture and elevate your chin even if you are on the phone. Guilt makes you slump and a heightened posture makes you sound, feel, and look more confident. Then you can put up your and simply state with no more than a few more words, “I simply can’t say yes.”

Again, these are ways to say no to guilt trips that are more diplomatic. However, don’t expect anyone to applaud you for declining the emotional extortion.

It will take a while to recondition those who have conditioned you to cave into their guilt trips. Then you can save the time and energy to go on actual trips and enjoy your life by saying yes to yourself while saying no to others.

Related: How to Say No at Work Without Feeling Guilty

Lynell Ross

Resource Director, Education Advocates

Some people have a knack for knowing how to push your buttons and manipulate you by using guilt. Whether they are conscious of what they are doing or not, this tactic works for them so they continue to throw out subtle remarks such as, “Don’t worry about me. I’m used to being all alone.”

Or they might use not so subtle manipulations such as attempting to make you feel sorry for them because you have more money, a better job, or more friends. Beware of a friend that says as you sit down to a meal out, “I wish I had a job that pays as much as yours. I can’t afford expensive meals.” Then you feel guilty and treat them to dinner.

Next time you run across someone who lays a guilt trip on you, remember this. No one can make you feel anything. It is up to you to know how to respond, and you can protect yourself by understanding guilt trips for what they are, the person’s attempt to manipulate your feelings and get you to do what they want.

When you see their guilt trip as an attempt to manipulate you, then you can stop feeling guilty and respond with awareness. Decide what is best for you, realizing that it isn’t selfish to take care of yourself.

What’s more, when you give in to manipulation or do something for someone else that they should be doing for themself, you enable them to continue the behavior that is harmful to themselves. You can learn to say no without feeling guilty.

You may have lived with a family member who guilted you into doing things your whole life, so are used to it. But laying a guilt trip on someone is unhealthy and problematic behavior. When you stop letting them make you feel guilty, it isn’t your problem any longer.

Jessica LaMarre

Writer, Love Personal Growth

What I have learned is a guilt trip can come from external people. However, the most challenging guilt trip to deal with, for me personally, is the internal guilt trip.

Imagine an ice cream sundae; first I would scoop on the repeated story in my head, the second I would add another scoop of how it impacted me, others, and/or work, and third I would top it off with some self-criticism.

As a working mom of three, the amount of guilt trip sundaes I am served is like living in a Baskin Robbins. “Mom, you hugged her first”, “Mom, you spent more time with brother”, “Mom, do you have to go to yoga, I want to play”, “Mom, are you done working, yet” , play on repeat.

I have spent the last two and a half years transforming my life, which has allowed my guilt trips to subside. Now, I rarely go through the process below, except when it comes to my kids. Here are some examples of those guilt trip sundaes.

For the first scoop, the repeat story:

• “I don’t have time for this, I have so much work to do.” The word ‘this’ in my story, pretty much-equaled anything else.
• “I cannot believe I am taking this time for me, there is so much that needs to be done” . This story was rare because I did not do much for me. When I did, it would make me feel guilty.
• “I need to complete this project, then I can practice that work/life balance thing”. Not true. You’re welcome, just letting you know from experience no matter how much you accomplish or achieve, there will always be more.

For the second scoop, how it could impact me, others, and/or work:

• “I won’t be considered for the (fill in the blank) if I don’t put in 60 hours a week” or “My co-workers and customers are counting on me”
• “I don’t need to take time for me, who goes to every 6 month dental cleaning anyways?”
• “We are not going to win this proposal if we don’t have all of this information, we need to do more research, yeah we need more information, I can take it on.”

Then top it off with some self-criticism:

• “Why did I even sign up for this? I should have known better.”
• “See, now you don’t have enough time to finish what you needed to get done!”
• “You should have known this all along, how did not you see this coming!”

A guilt trip can make for a messy sundae, especially for our mental, physical, and emotional health. In the book, ‘Language of Emotions’ by Karla McLaren, I learned guilt and shame are a form of anger that arises when your boundary has been broken from the inside — by something you’ve done wrong or have been convinced is wrong.

Once I learned this, I noticed that when I am not holding to my boundaries, I feel guilty. Learning my boundaries and sticking to them, which often results in me saying no, has reduced my overall guilt.

Here are three steps to spot the guilt trip and respond.

• Step 1: Become aware – learn when, where, and with whom you experience guilt (who could be work).
• Step 2: How do you respond to the scoops? What is the repeated story you tell yourself? How do you believe this story impacts your life? What self-criticism follows?
• Step 3: Know it is OK to say No. The word no can be a complete sentence.

I love the quote from Warren Buffet: “The difference between successful people and really successful people is those really successful people say no to almost everything.”

Learn your boundaries and give yourself permission to say no. From experience, I can say there will be a lot less guilt-trip sundaes.

Why Do We Sometimes Respond to Guilt Trips?

Guilt trips are a form of emotional manipulation that exploit the feelings of guilt and responsibility in others. Here are some reasons why people may respond to guilt trips:

• Emotional Connection: Guilt trips often involve people close to us, such as friends, family, or partners. When we have a strong emotional connection with someone, we may feel obligated to comply with their requests or desires.

• Sense of Responsibility: People may respond to guilt trips because they feel a strong sense of responsibility for the happiness and well-being of the person making the request.

• Fear of Conflict: People may respond to guilt trips because they fear that saying no will result in conflict or disappointment in their relationships.

• Insecurity: Some people may respond to guilt trips because they are insecure and seek approval or validation from others. Feeling guilty can reinforce the belief that they are responsible for the other person’s happiness and can lead to a sense of validation.

• Lack of Assertiveness: Some people may respond to guilt trips because they lack assertiveness and feel unable to say no. They may also feel that saying no would make them appear selfish or unkind.

What Phrases Are Commonly Used to Guilt Trip?

Guilt-tripping is a manipulative tactic used to manipulate and control others by making them feel guilty, ashamed, or obligated to act in a certain way. There are several phrases commonly used in guilt-tripping, including:

• “I can’t believe you would do this to me.” • “How could you be so selfish?” • “I did so much for you, and this is how you repay me?” • “Don’t you care about me?” • “I thought you were better than this.” • “After everything I’ve done for you, this is how you treat me?” • “I trusted you.” • “I don’t understand how you could do this.” •”I never thought you would hurt me like this.” • “I thought we had something special.”

If someone uses these phrases to control you, standing up for yourself and setting boundaries is essential. You deserve to be treated with respect and control over your decisions and actions.

How Do We Respond to Guilt Trips From Mom?

Responding to guilt trips from our mothers can be a challenging situation. However, some strategies can help us handle these feelings and communicate effectively with our mothers.

• Acknowledge your feelings: Understanding and acknowledging our guilt is important before responding to our mother’s guilt trip. This can help us stay calm and composed during the conversation.

• Communicate clearly: Be clear and direct in your communication. Let your mother know how her guilt trip makes you feel and why you will not comply with her request.

• Set boundaries: Guilt trips can happen when we feel like we’re not meeting our mother’s expectations. It’s important to set clear boundaries and communicate what we’re comfortable with.

• Empathize: Try to understand where your mother is coming from and her motivations. This can help you respond to her more understanding and compassionately.

• Focus on the present: Guilt trips often stem from past or future expectations. Try to focus on the present moment and what you can do right now to address the situation.

• Seek support: If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the guilt trip, reach out to friends, family members, or a therapist for support. Talking to someone can help you process your feelings and gain a fresh perspective on the situation.

• Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself can help you feel more resilient and empowered in the face of guilt trips. Engage in activities that bring you joy and help you relax.

By using these strategies, we can respond to guilt trips from our mothers in a healthy and effective way. Remember, it’s okay to set boundaries and prioritize our own well-being.

How Do You Express Your Feelings Without Guilt-Tripping?

Expressing one’s feelings is an important aspect of communication and can help improve relationships. However, it’s essential to do so in a way that doesn’t make the other person feel guilty. Here’s how to express your feelings without guilt-tripping:

• Be clear and direct: Be clear and concise in your communication, and use “I” statements instead of blaming or accusing the other person. For instance, “I feel hurt when you don’t listen to me” instead of “You never listen to me.”

• Take responsibility for your own feelings: It’s important to remember that your feelings are your own responsibility, not someone else’s. So, instead of making the other person responsible for how you feel, express your feelings as your own experience.

• Focus on the behavior, not the person: When expressing your feelings, focus on specific behaviors or actions that are bothering you rather than attacking the person’s character.

• Be open to feedback: Be open to hearing the other person’s perspective, and try to see things from their point of view. This can help reduce tension and facilitate a more productive conversation.

• Avoid ultimatums: Avoid making demands or ultimatums, as this can create an environment of pressure and guilt. Instead, try to find a solution that works for both of you.

• Practice active listening: Listen attentively to the other person’s response, and try to understand their perspective. This can help avoid misunderstandings and create a more positive and respectful environment.

• Avoid blame or shame: Blaming can only worsen the situation and lead to defensiveness and further conflict. Instead, focus on finding a solution that works for you.

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GUILT TRIP in a Sentence Examples: 21 Ways to Use Guilt Trip

Have you ever felt the weight of guilt on your shoulders after being emotionally manipulated by someone into feeling responsible for their feelings or actions? This is what is commonly referred to as a “guilt trip.”

A guilt trip is a form of psychological manipulation where an individual tries to make someone feel guilty for not meeting their expectations or desires. This can be done through passive-aggressive comments, emotional blackmail, or playing the role of the victim to evoke a sense of responsibility in the other person.

Table of Contents

7 Examples Of Guilt Trip Used In a Sentence For Kids

• Guilt trip happens when we feel sad about something we did.
• We should not try to make our friends go on a guilt trip .
• It’s important to talk about our feelings instead of giving someone a guilt trip .
• We should be kind to others and not use guilt trips .
• If someone gives us a guilt trip , we can talk to a grown-up about it.
• Let’s remember to say sorry if we hurt someone’s feelings instead of giving them a guilt trip .
• We can always choose to forgive others instead of making them go on a guilt trip .

14 Sentences with Guilt Trip Examples

• Have you finished your assignment yet? I don’t want to *guilt trip * you, but it’s due tomorrow.
• Your friends are waiting for you to join them for a study session. Don’t make them *guilt trip * you for not coming.
• Don’t forget to call your parents. They might *guilt trip * you for not staying in touch.
• Are you going to skip class again? Your professor might *guilt trip * you for not attending.
• You promised to help your classmates with a project. They will surely *guilt trip * you if you back out now.
• Your roommates have been cleaning after you all week. It’s time to clean up your mess and not let them *guilt trip * you about it.
• Don’t neglect your health. Your body will *guilt trip * you if you keep avoiding exercise and healthy eating habits.
• You haven’t been participating in any extracurricular activities. Your friends might *guilt trip * you for not joining them.
• Remember the time you borrowed notes from your friend? It’s time to return the favor, or they might *guilt trip * you for it.
• Did you forget about the group project meeting? Your team members are going to *guilt trip * you for not showing up.
• Your younger sibling looks up to you. Don’t disappoint them, or they will *guilt trip * you for not setting a good example.
• Your family is counting on you to succeed. Don’t let them *guilt trip * you for not giving your best in your studies.
• You keep procrastinating on your assignments. Your professors might *guilt trip * you for not submitting your work on time.
• You skipped a family gathering to hang out with friends. Don’t be surprised if your relatives *guilt trip * you for not prioritizing family time.

How To Use Guilt Trip in Sentences?

To use Guilt Trip in a sentence, start by identifying a situation where someone is attempting to make you feel guilty for something. For example, if a friend is trying to get you to do something you don’t want to do by making you feel bad about it, you can respond with a Guilt Trip sentence.

Here’s an example: “I know you really want me to come to the party, but I have other plans already. Please don’t Guilt Trip me about it.”

Alternatively, you can also use Guilt Trip in a sentence to describe someone who frequently tries to manipulate others with guilt. For instance, “She always tries to Guilt Trip me into doing things I don’t want to do.”

When using Guilt Trip in a sentence, it’s important to be assertive and clear about your boundaries. Make sure to communicate your feelings honestly and respectfully, without resorting to manipulative behavior yourself.

Remember, Guilt Trip is a tactic used by some individuals to control or influence others, so it’s crucial to recognize when it’s being used on you and to respond appropriately. Guilt Trip can be a powerful tool, but it’s essential to use it responsibly and consider how your words may impact others.

In relationships, using guilt trips can be manipulative and damaging. These sentences carry undertones of blame and coercion, often causing the recipient to feel obligated or guilty for not meeting expectations. Engaging in guilt trips can foster resentment, erode trust, and harm the dynamics between individuals.

Healthy communication in relationships involves expressing feelings and needs openly and respectfully. Instead of resorting to guilt trips, strive for clear and honest dialogue that promotes understanding and compromises. By focusing on compassion, empathy, and mutual respect, relationships can thrive and grow positively, devoid of the negative impact that guilt trips can bring.

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Guilt-trip in a Sentence  🔊

Definition of Guilt-trip

an occurrence of believing your guilty of something not justified by reality

Examples of Guilt-trip in a sentence

I wish my parents would stop laying a guilt-trip on me for not going to college.  🔊

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Column: Trump’s hush money trial will go to the jury soon. What’s the most likely verdict?

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After 20 days, 22 witnesses and intermittent courtroom fireworks, the evidence in Donald Trump’s New York hush money trial is all in . The case will soon be in the hands of the jury.

Who holds the advantage at this critical juncture? My assessment, after attending much of the trial in person, is that it’s the prosecution’s case to lose.

With the standing caveat that it takes only one juror to block a unanimous guilty verdict — and that the law puts the greatest burden on prosecutors — the case as it has come in puts the district attorney’s office in the driver’s seat going into next week’s closing arguments.

Litman: How Trump’s trial will go well beyond the charges to paint a damning portrait of him

New York’s rules will allow prosecutors to present evidence of other bad acts in trying the former president on the Stormy Daniels hush money allegations.

April 22, 2024

The prosecution’s essential achievement was to provide a compelling, credible narrative that points toward only one plausible conclusion: that Trump is guilty as charged.

The defense, by contrast, took a scattershot approach focused on undermining the credibility of any and all of the prosecution’s witnesses, particularly Michael Cohen , Trump’s former attorney and fixer. But what Trump’s lawyers didn’t do is provide a counternarrative, a story compelling enough to leave jurors with a reasonable doubt as to which explanation of the facts is true.

Providing such a competing story isn’t the defense’s legal obligation, of course. The judge will instruct the jurors that if they have any reasonable doubt about the prosecution’s case, they should vote to acquit.

Litman: Michael Cohen is testifying against Trump. Here’s what prosecutors need from him

The key witness in the New York hush money trial said the then-candidate told him to do what he had to do to suppress Stormy Daniels’ story of a liaison with him.

May 13, 2024

But my experience as a trial lawyer suggests a difference between freestanding doubt about one or more witnesses and a broader doubt about the rationale behind the charges — an alternative plotline that jurors might find believable. That’s the kind of defense being presented on behalf of Sen. Robert Menendez, for example, who is arguing that his wife is the guilty party.

From the first day of testimony, the prosecution has presented a tight, persuasive tale. It begins with an August 2015 meeting involving Trump, Cohen and tabloid executive David Pecker — who explained it to the jury from the stand — in which the parties agreed on a scheme to smother negative stories about Trump.

And sure enough, before the next year’s election, a series of scandal-mongers required neutralizing to insulate Trump from political damage. These episodes are akin to Acts II and III of the script, falling into place along the tracks that the Pecker testimony laid.

Hope Hicks ’ testimony was brief but powerful given her longtime loyal service to Trump and her obvious candor notwithstanding her reluctance to harm her former boss, which seemed to cause her to break into tears. She confirmed in dramatic terms that Cohen and Allen Weisselberg, the Trump Organization’s then-chief financial officer, would not have cooked up the scheme to pay off the adult-film actor Stormy Daniels without Trump’s say-so.

The prosecution effectively corroborated in advance most of what would come from its last and most important witness, Cohen. At the same time, the prosecutors encouraged their own witnesses to disparage Cohen, lowering expectations before he took the stand.

When he did, Cohen was low-key, responsive and agreeable. With a few exceptions, he accepted the insults the defense served up, accounting for most of the discrepancies in his story by explaining that he had been telling the truth since he left the Trump fold.

A couple of low points in Cohen’s testimony got a lot of attention, and it’s natural for the media to zero in on dramatic moments. But the jury is more likely to evaluate the evidence in the context of the whole narrative and a witness’ general comportment.

Most important, jurors, like all of us, make overall judgments about credibility, which is the heart and soul of the jury system. Taking the measure of the people before them, they decide whether their accounts are basically trustworthy, notwithstanding the defects of the messengers. And all the stories in this case — not just Cohen’s but those of other flawed witnesses such as Pecker and Daniels — cohere and ring true.

It follows that the impertinence of Robert Costello , a defense witness who muttered in disagreement with Judge Juan M. Merchan’s rulings, probably caught the jury’s attention more than the flaws in Cohen’s largely even presentation — especially once Merchan forcefully rebuked Costello’s buffoonish grandstanding.

The prosecution’s cross-examination of Costello and redirect of both Cohen and Daniels were crisp, clear, textbook demolitions of the defense’s points. Trump’s team was more meandering and given to stray potshots, missing more than they hit.

I think the defense still has one largely overlooked escape hatch: the arcane legal instructions for deciding the felony charges. The charges require the prosecution to prove that Trump caused the alleged falsification of documents to further another crime. Prosecutors have offered up three different candidates for that other crime, each of which has flaws. I could see the jury, which includes two lawyers, considering the legal instructions very carefully and finding that the district attorney came up short. And in any event, the issue is sure to figure in an appeal.

But any appeal feels a millennium away. By the time that transpires, Trump will either be president, giving him extensive options for evading accountability, or a losing candidate facing three other criminal trials. This trial looks increasingly likely to be the only opportunity for a jury to decide for the first time whether a former president is a criminal. Going into the final act, I like the chances that he will be found guilty.

Harry Litman is the host of the “Talking Feds” podcast and the Talking San Diego speaker series. @harrylitman

More to Read

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May 28, 2024

Closing arguments, jury instructions and maybe a verdict? Major week looms in Trump hush money trial

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May 25, 2024

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Harry Litman, the senior legal affairs columnist for the Opinion page, is a former U.S. attorney and deputy assistant attorney general. He is the creator and host of the “Talking Feds” podcast ( @talkingfedspod ). Litman teaches constitutional and national security law at UCLA and UC San Diego and is a regular commentator on MSNBC, CNN and CBS News.

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U.S. tourist is freed after facing jail in Turks and Caicos for possessing ammunition

PROVIDENCIALES, Turks and Caicos — An American man who was facing up to 12 years in jail on this Caribbean island for bringing 20 rounds of ammunition on a vacation has been freed after a court ruling Friday.

Bryan Hagerich was arrested in February while on a vacation with his wife and two children. He pleaded guilty to bringing the bullets in his luggage and argued that he should be released because of the time he's already served and his admission of guilt.

At Hagerich's sentencing hearing, at the nation's Supreme Court on the island of Providenciales, Judge Tanya Lobban Jackson sentenced him to "52 weeks but 12 months suspended," meaning he will not serve any time in jail.

Jackson said she found exceptional circumstances for Hagerich, and cited that he had unintentionally brought the ammunition to the island, the impact that his arrest has had on his daughter and that he has no criminal background.

The judge told Hagerich to "be more careful," and released him. The Hagerich family were seen hugging and in tears after the decision.

Hagerich, a former MLB draftee, will now return to his two children in Pennsylvania after making a payment of $6,700, which his attorney said he is able to pay.

"This is a huge relief," Hagerich's father told NBC News in the courtroom.

No cameras were allowed inside court Friday.

After court, an emotional Hagerich told reporters he was "absolutely elated."

"Can't wait to get home — I have two kids that just can't wait to jump into our arms," he said while holding hands with his wife.

"This is what we've been waiting for for the last 101 days and to experience this here — in eight short hours to be home and hug my kids — it's the best day," Hagerich said.

Hagerich said his work isn't done until all the other Americans detained in Turks and Caicos, whom he called his family, are released.

Sen. John Fetterman, D-Pa., who met Hagerich and other detained Americans in Turks and Caico Island this week, said the decision is "great news."

"When we met with TCI officials a few days ago, they made clear that they wanted this situation resolved," Fetterman said in a statement. "They recognized that Bryan and the other detained Americans are not gunrunners — they are just people who made a mistake. I’m grateful that the judge recognized that the right thing to do was to send Bryan home."

Fetterman said he hopes the British overseas territory expedites the remaining cases of Americans detained there so they can also be reunited with their families.

Hagerich was the first of five American tourists facing punishment for taking ammunition to the country, which is forbidden due to recent legislation that carries a 12-year sentence for bringing unauthorized weapons or ammunition into the country.

The remaining four defendants were waiting nervously for the result of Friday's hearing, which could provide a clue to how their cases might be handled.

All the tourists say their charges are the result of an honest mistake.

The most recently arrested of the five is Sharitta Grier, a Florida grandmother who was arrested while on a Mother's Day trip when airport staff found two bullets in her carry-on luggage on May 13. Her next court appearance is scheduled for July.

Ryan Watson , from Oklahoma, who was arrested while on vacation to celebrate his 40th birthday, has a plea hearing on May 28. Although he technically already plead guilty, he has to have an official plea hearing. His sentencing hearing is currently set for June 7th. On Tuesday, Watson will also be requesting that his sentencing date be expedited.

Watson said the ruling in Hagerich's case gave him hope.

"I pray that I get the same opportunity to go home," he told NBC News, adding that when he heard the judge's decision in court he thought, "I'm one step closer to maybe seeing my kiddos."

"I know that our cases are similar but they're not exactly the same, so that doesn't guarantee my fate," he said. "So I just, you know, I just pray that I get to go home soon."

A group of U.S. lawmakers visited Turks and Caicos this week in an attempt to secure their release.

Secretary of State Antony Blinken told a heated session of the House Committee on Appropriations, in response to pointed criticism of his department's handling of the issue by Rep. Guy Reschenthaler, R-Pa., that his staff were doing all it could.

"We have a State Department and extraordinary men and women who every single day are working to get arbitrarily detained Americans back home with their families and loved ones," he said.

The Turks and Caicos prime minister, Charles Washington Misick, appeared unmoved by U.S. attempts at lobbying for the tourists' release, telling a session of the country's legislature: "Judges can impose a custodial sentences of less than 12 years and a fine that they consider fair and just in accordance with sentencing guidelines in each case."

"We do not target U.S. citizens, or any other nationality," he said.

Although, Misick also said that the relatively new 12-year sentence for ammunition possession had never been imposed and could be overturned in "exceptional circumstances."

The U.S. Embassy in the Bahamas issued a  warning to travelers  in September for Turks and Caicos. The overseas British territory southeast of the Bahamas has strict penalties for weapons possession.

Juliette Arcodia reported from Providenciales, Turks and Caicos, and Patrick Smith reported London.

Patrick Smith is a London-based editor and reporter for NBC News Digital.