visit from the dead meaning

21 Signs Your Deceased Loved One is Visiting You from Beyond

Losing someone you deeply love leaves an immense void. As you navigate profound grief, your departed loved one’s presence can feel farther away than ever. Yet healing happens when we cultivate spiritual connection through signs beyond the physical world.

Deceased loved ones actually increase their efforts to connect with us post-death. Physical death does not sever the soul’s energetic bond or unconditional love. Your loved ones in spirit want to ease your grief by conveying they are peacefully watching over you.

How do deceased loved ones communicate through signs from beyond the veil? For them to manifest in our realm requires delicately optimizing frequencies. Being receptive to subtle signs of their spiritual presence serves and strengthens your eternal bond.

This article will analyze some of the most profound signs indicating a deceased loved one is visiting your energetic field. Learning to recognize these spiritual communications conveys deep comfort and meaning for the journey of loss ahead.

1. Sensing Their Presence

The number one sign your deceased loved one is with you is an intuitive sensing of their presence. You may feel the energy shift in a room, like someone is nearby. The feeling may be subtle or quite strong and overwhelming.

You might sense their presence is sitting next to you, laying in bed, or following you throughout your day. This sign indicates their eternal love and desire to support you during difficult times. Try speaking to them in your mind or aloud.

2. Smelling Their Signature Scent

Scent is closely tied to memory. You may inexplicably smell your loved one’s perfume, cologne, or favorite food. Any scent tied specifically to them is a sign they are visiting.

Don’t dismiss fleeting scents in strange places. Your mind isn’t playing tricks on you. In those moments, your deceased loved one is igniting your senses to remind you of your eternal bond.

3. Finding Meaningful Objects

Your loved one may get your attention using coins, feathers, or other small objects. You’ll intuitively know an object is from them if it reminds you of them.

Meaningful objects are commonly placed in your path, like finding a dime where one shouldn’t be. They may also move belongings to noticeable spots, like setting your keys on their favorite table.

4. Electrical Signs

Spirits can manipulate electricity to signal their presence. Flickering lights, appliances turning on, static on radios, or draining batteries indicate spiritual energy interfering with electronics.

Electrical signs often happen in conjunction with other validating experiences. Together, they indicate your loved one wants to connect and comfort you.

5. Dreams and Visions

Dreams are a common way for deceased loved ones to visit. Unlike regular dreams, visitation dreams feel extremely vivid and real. Your loved one often appears healthy, happy, and whole.

Their purpose is to reassure you they’re at peace. Sometimes they relay direct messages or act as a guide. Visions work similarly, offering glimpses of the afterlife and your loved one within it.

6. Seeing Signs in Nature

Your loved one may send animal messengers like cardinals, butterflies, and dragonflies. These creatures arrive unexpectedly when you most need reassurance. Their appearance and behavior will give you a peaceful feeling of their presence.

You may also notice meaningful symbols or patterns in clouds, rocks, plants, and other natural objects. Try looking for signs without expectation and interpret them intuitively.

7. Hearing Songs or Sounds

Hearing your loved one’s favorite song or a meaningful melody is a sign they are with you. This may happen when your radio plays their song or you hear it in public right after thinking of them.

Listen for songs that evoke their memory and remind you of your eternal bond. Your loved one may also connect through sounds like knocking, footsteps, or whispers of your name.

8. Number Synchronicities

If you notice the same numbers over and over, like repetitive digits or special number sequences, this is likely a sign from beyond. Numbers can represent significant dates, ages, addresses, or codes between you and your loved one.

Monitor your thoughts when these number synchronicities occur. Your loved one is trying to validate their presence and connect through meaning. Ask for clarity and watch for additional confirming signs.

9. Communication Through Pets

Your pets are highly intuitive and may serve as mediums between realms. Notice their focus and behavior when you sense your loved one near.

Your pet staring, wagging their tail, or moving towards something invisible may indicate they perceive your loved one’s spiritual presence. Pets help validate your own senses and intuitive feelings.

10. Finding White Feathers

White feathers are considered strong spiritual signs from heaven. Seeing them rectifies worries about finances or the future, as white feathers symbolize spiritual protection and providence.

Noticing a white feather soon after grief or loss is powerful validation that your loved one is with you and God is watching over your path ahead. Keep white feathers you find as comforting reminders.

11. Spontaneous Crying

You may find yourself spontaneously crying or feeling suddenly depressed or anxious without known cause. This could indicate your loved one is helping release suppressed emotions so you can heal.

Try speaking to your loved one during moments of unexplained emotion. Express how much you miss them and love them. Use this cathartic release to process your loss at a deeper level.

12. Touching Sensations

Some people feel the distinct sensation of being touched, held, hugged, or having their hair brushed. Pay close attention to any physical touch that brings comfort or a sense of calm peace.

While not the most common sign, sensing touch from beyond is extremely powerful. Your loved one is trying to provide tangible reassurance that they are still with you.

13. Glimpsing Visions

You may briefly glimpse your deceased loved one out of the corner of your eye or as a blurry image that quickly disappears. These fleeting visions often happen in places your loved one spent a lot of time or felt most at home.

Even fast glimpses indicate your loved one is making an effort to visually manifest in order to validate their continued presence and unconditional love.

14. Signs Through Flowers

Your loved one may send signs through flowers, plants, and herbs. Noticing their favorite flower unexpectedly or flowers blooming out of season can be validation from beyond.

Some common flower signs include roses, lilies, lavender, snapdragons, daisies, carnations, and any flower significant to your relationship with your loved one. Keep fresh flowers in your home to welcome in their energy.

15. Awareness of Time Passing

You may suddenly notice specific times or see repetitive numbers like 11:11 that remind you of your loved one. Developing awareness of time can also indicate your perception is expanding to catch more signs from beyond.

These occurrences bring your focus to thoughts of your loved one. Notice if you feel their presence stronger or receive additional validating signs when certain times or numbers catch your eye.

16. Finding Meaningful Stones

Discovering unusual or meaningful stones, like perfectly smooth wishing stones, indicates your loved one wants your attention. Keep special stones as reminders of your eternal bond.

Your loved one may continue placing stones or other small objects in your path to get you to notice signs from them and acknowledge their enduring presence.

17. Rainbows

Rainbows symbolize hope, joy, and spiritual connection. Noticing a rainbow, especially soon after loss, conveys your loved one is at peace and wants you to keep living life fully.

Rainbows reassure you that though death separates us physically, our spirits remain eternally connected through unconditional love that transcends this realm.

18. Monarch Butterflies

The monarch butterfly specifically symbolizes spiritual rebirth and the soul’s transformation after death. Seeing monarchs soon after loss strongly indicates the presence of your loved one guiding you through grief.

Monarchs remind us our spirits are eternal and your loved one lives on in your heart. Let their presence comfort and inspire your own spiritual transformation.

19. Dragonflies

Like butterflies, seeing dragonflies increase after loss are likely signs from your loved one. Dragonflies symbolize wisdom, hope, lightness, and living life to the fullest.

If dragonflies cross your path unexpectedly, interpret it as validation that your loved one is near and wants you to embrace life and all its transformations.

Rain and thunderstorms can signify emotional cleansing from grief. Like tears flowing from the sky, rain reminds us it’s okay to deeply feel loss. It cleanses suppressed emotions so we can move forward in the grieving process.

Your loved one may send rain to help release feelings like guilt, anger, deep sadness, and pain. Allow the rain to open your heart and connect with your loved one through catharsis.

21. Auric Energy Fields

You may notice color auras or energy fields surrounding people, animals, or objects. Seeing auras indicates your third eye is opening, allowing you to perceive subtle spiritual energies beyond the physical realms.

This expanded perception enables clearer communication between you and your deceased loved ones. Notice auric color changes when sensing your loved one’s presence. Keep meditating to enhance this psychic gift.

Final Thoughts

Recognizing even one of the signs above conveys powerful validation that your deceased loved ones are still with you. These spiritual communications require just as much effort from them as receptivity does from you.

Rather than searching intently for signs, relax your mind and heighten awareness through meditation. Let signs unfold naturally to bring you peace and guidance for your grief journey ahead.

When you need extra clarity, seeking a professional medium reading can help interpret signs and messages from your deceased loved ones. Their eternal love surrounds you, always.

Bella Nguen

Recognised and rated #1 by most popular lifestyle magazines, indielogy exists to provide the most accurate astrology, tarot & psychic reading., all listing, 2024 © indielogy. all rights reserved..

When Someone Dies, Can They Come Back to See You?

• Seeking Truth
• Paranormal & Unexplained
• Afterlife & NDE

No matter what your spiritual beliefs are, dealing with the death of a loved one can be incredibly difficult. The smallest message or sign from a deceased loved one can mean the world to any human being. However, there are several ways to receive messages from the dead, but they can be rather subtle and might be overlooked or discounted if you don’t know what to look for. Explore life after death to learn whether a deceased person is trying to contact you from the spirit world.

Loved Ones Communicating Beyond the Grave

There are countless cases of loved ones contacting their living counterparts after they’ve passed, or in some cases while they’ve been clinically dead, before being brought back to life.

In one instance, recounted by Dr. Raymond Moody , the researcher who coined the phrase near-death experience or NDE, a surgeon once told him that while operating on a young man, his patient went into cardiac arrest. Believing he had lost the patient, the man’s wife burst into the room screaming that her husband had visited her in the waiting room and told her the doctor thought he was dead but that he was still alive and able to be saved. The surgeon immediately began to perform resuscitation techniques and brought the patient back to life.

After-death communication is very common soon after a loved one passes away. And while everyone’s loved ones have different ways of communicating this, the signs we see are usually more than sheer coincidence.

When looking for signs of a loved one visiting or communicating with you after they have passed, think of things from their life that they had a predilection for, whether that’s a particular animal, flower, or song. These personal affections typically appear in their attempts to reach you in the physical world, and rightfully so. If there’s one thing you’d associate strongly with them, it’s sure to stand out.

4 Common Signs From Deceased Loved Ones

When looking for signs from the other side, it can help to reminisce on the life and accomplishments of the loved one who passed. Thinking back on their life and the things they did or were interested in might help clue you in on some of the ways they may try to reach you.

If you aren’t entirely familiar with certain periods of their life, doing some research by reconnecting with other family members and friends or digging through their memorabilia may provide more insight into their past. Understanding their history will allow them to connect with you more easily for the first time.

Here are four common ways a deceased loved one’s spirit may be trying to make contact:

Visitation Dreams

When your loved ones visit in a dream, it will feel peaceful and more real than a typical dream. Instead of just watching your dream like a movie, you’ll be able to control what you say and do.

It’s common to wake up after you’ve received a message from your loved ones, so if you suddenly wake up in the middle of the night, try to remember what you were dreaming about.

To make it easier for your loved ones to visit you in dreams, start paying attention to your dreams and writing them down the next day. Have a notebook and pen by your bed, and let your loved ones know before you go to sleep that you’d like a visit from them.

Electrical Phenomena

Electricity is easy for spirits to manipulate. When you’re thinking of your loved ones or celebrating a family event, watch out for lights flickering, strange phone calls, uncanny songs that come up on a playlist, a stereo suddenly turning on and playing a loved one’s favorite song, or phones or other electronics malfunctioning in ways that can’t be explained logically. It might be a little “hello” from the great beyond .

Special Signs

A million different events happen in your day, and none of them stand out to you. When a seemingly benign event suddenly grabs your attention and makes you question if it’s a sign from your loved one in spirit…it probably is.

Most signs are subtle. You probably won’t get a marching band coming to your house with a sign that reads, “Mom says hi!” It’s much more likely that when you’re thinking about your mother, a picture of her falls off the wall, a dove with white feathers flies by, somebody gives you a bouquet of her favorite flowers, or you stumble upon a card from her that you’d forgotten about. It may not be the specific sign you asked for, but if you suddenly wonder if it’s a sign and think of your loved one, it’s a sign.

Through People

You might see someone who looks just like your loved one. It will look as if your loved one’s image is superimposed on another person’s face or body.

Another way your loved ones in spirit can say hello is by appearing in the dream of a friend or family member. When your best friend or family member tells you about their experience, you might wonder why your loved one in spirit didn’t come directly to you. If you’re experiencing a lot of grief over a loved one’s passing , it may be difficult for you to recognize a direct message from them, so they will send you messages through people who are close to you. They are just letting you know that they are okay.

It’s also possible to get in touch with a deceased loved one through a psychic medium, empaths, tarot readers, or some other person who is gifted with mediumship. Looking into a medium that can provide you with a numerology reading about your loved one’s past life can also help. However, it’s always good to exercise caution and fully vet this person as there are, unfortunately, charlatans out there.

Being Cautious

When attempting to make contact with the spiritual realm or a dead person, it’s crucial to proceed with caution. Contacting the wrong departed individual can potentially invite random or unintended apparitions into your home or life. This warning is worth heeding because not all entities from the spiritual world mean well. Intentionally or unintentionally connecting with the wrong spirit can bring forth energies or spirits that may not align with positive or comforting experiences. It’s akin to opening a door without knowing who or what might be on the other side, making it essential to approach any form of spiritual contact with care and discernment.

Seeking Comfort

During the grieving process, it’s necessary to seek comfort in whatever it is that can bring it to you. Whether that means reaching out to your spirit guides, guardian angel, family members, mental health professional, local support group, or the solitude of being with your inner self, it’s natural to find a way to ease the pain.

Whether you’re grieving over a deceased friend, dead relatives, or a dead loved one, it’s okay to seek comfort anywhere you can, as long as that which is comforting you isn’t self-destructive or addictive.

Now that you know four common ways your loved ones in spirit can contact you, be on the lookout for signs and messages from them.

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How To Tell if Your House Is Haunted? 16 Signs To Look For

Are you encountering strange sounds, items disappearing, or lights turning on randomly in your home? These may be telltale signs that your house is haunted. All hauntings are different and can vary from hearing a door slamming occasionally to seeing full apparitions. Commonly believed to occur only in old homes in the middle of the night, as seen in many horror movies, hauntings have also been investigated in new homes and can occur in broad daylight.

Not every mysterious noise or vision has a logical explanation. It’s important to understand if your house is haunted to determine the appropriate steps to take.

Common Signs of a Haunted House

If you noticed these early warning signs, then someone else or something else could be occupying your home:

1. Unexplained Noises

These strange noises can include footsteps, knocking, banging, scratching, or something being dropped. These noises can be subtle, and at other times, they can be quite loud.

2. Doors, Cabinets, and Cupboards Opening and Closing

Very rarely will the experiencer ever witness this phenomenon take place. Most often, the experiencer will hear creaks as a door opens or closes, and when investigated, the door is typically in the opposite position it was previously.

3. Lights Turning Off and On

Lights will turn on and off when the experiencer knows they previously left it on or off. This occurrence is also rarely witnessed. This can also happen to electrically powered devices like TVs and radios.

4. Items Disappearing and Reappearing

This phenomenon is called the DOPler Effect (DOP = Disappearing Object Phenomenon). Experiencers will place an everyday object in a typical spot in the house. Later, when they retrieve that item, it is gone and nowhere to be found after a thorough search. Hours, days, or weeks later, the object reappears in the exact position it was left in before it went missing.

5. Unexplained Shadowy Figures

Fleeting shadows are normally seen out of the corner of your eyes. These shadows typically take human forms, also known as Shadow People , while at other times, they are less distinguishable or smaller.

6. Strange Animal Behavior

Dogs will sometimes bark at something unseen, cower without reason, or refuse to enter a room they normally do. While cats seem to be watching something move about the room. Animals do have sharper senses than humans, and many researchers feel their psychic abilities are allowing them to notice this behavior quicker and better.

7. Feelings of Being Watched

Many people tend to get the feeling of being watched throughout the day, but if the feeling is consistently occurring in a specific part of the house at a particular time, it may be attributed to supernatural forces.

Stronger Signs of a Haunted Home

These next signs are rarer paranormal activity but could be stronger proof of a haunting:

8. Mild Psychokinetic Phenomena

Actually seeing a door open or close, a flickering light bulb, or a child’s toy turn on by itself. Others state they can hear or feel something sitting on the bed next to them.

9. Feelings of Being Touched

Some feel something brush past them, touch their hair, or a “hand” on their shoulder. Others can feel a gentle poke, push, or nudge.

10. Strange Sounds

Some can hear voices, whispering, crying, or even music from an unknown source.

11. Notable Temperature Changes

Cold spots in your house are one sign that your home could be haunted.

12. Unusual Smells

A fragrance of perfume or cologne that does not exist in your house. This phenomenon may be accompanied by shadows, voices, or psychokinetic phenomena.

Powerful Signs of a Paranormal Presence

Poltergeist activity is rare but is the strongest evidence of a true haunting :

13. Severe Psychokinetic Phenomena

Some instances of this phenomenon include plates sliding off the table, pictures flying off the walls, doors slamming with great force, or furniture sliding across the floor.

14. Physical Assault

This type of phenomenon is very rare but includes scratches, slaps, and hard shoves.

15. Other Physical Evidence

This can include unexplained writing on paper or walls, handprints, and footprints.

16. Apparitions or Ghostly Figures

This very rare phenomenon is a physical manifestation of a spirit or entity. These human-shaped forms can be seen as mist, transparent, or solid.

My House is Haunted, Now What?

If you suspect that your house is haunted, you have several options. Firstly, consider keeping a journal to document any unusual occurrences and their frequency. It may also be helpful to consult with a reputable paranormal investigator or psychic medium to assess the situation and provide support. Furthermore, you can perform cleansing rituals or prayers to create a sense of peace and protection in your home. Finally, if the paranormal activity persists and you feel unsafe, consider relocating to a new residence. Yes, this is particularly challenging for homeowners, but the alternative is having an evil spirit for a roommate.

Communicating with Spirits and Risks

While communicating with spirits can be tempting, it’s essential to approach such interactions with extreme caution due to the real-life dangers involved. Engaging in practices like using Ouija boards or participating in séances can open channels to the spirit world, inviting not only communication with loved ones but with negative energies or malevolent entities . Bad encounters can lead to emotional distress, psychological instability, or spiritual attachment if proper precautions are not taken. So, it’s crucial to be mindful of one’s intentions and boundaries when attempting to communicate with spirits and seek guidance from paranormal experts to ensure your safety.

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In this article, I’m going to give you some tips on what you can do to draw your deceased loved ones closer to you, and I’m also going to give some examples of signs that they are already communicating with you.

This topic has been on my mind a fair bit lately, mostly because I’ve been hearing a lot from my deceased grandparents in recent weeks, including one I’ve never heard from before.

The lady in this picture is my paternal grandmother, Frances Adams.

She died one week before I was born. My dad didn’t talk much about his mum when we were growing up. All I knew about her was that she worked in a factory and she played the piano. And when she died of a stroke when he was 29, he was devastated. I remember when he talked about her death, it was still a very painful topic for him and he looks very sad in my baby photos.

And then when I went to visit my dad (who lives in New Zealand) in February of this year, my dad confessed that after 40 years of being estranged from his older sisters (after an argument), he was hoping to track them down or at least find out if they were still around and if they would be interested in reconnecting. His mum (Frances), came through to me, loud and clear and told me where to look for them and how to approach getting in touch. She also told me what to expect in terms of whether they are alive or dead, and it didn’t take long to track one of my dad’s sisters down, using the info she gave.

Around this time, I also had a dream about Frances. In the dream, I was in a hospital (I’m not sure why) and she was also there to visit someone. She was wearing an orange blouse, the same colour as the dress she was wearing in the photo above, and she looked very smart. In the dream, she spoke to me, and although I couldn’t remember what she said, I remember she was very softly spoken and seemed like quite a gentle person.

I woke up in the morning with her voice (that I had never heard before in real life) ringing in my ears. I felt so close to this person I had never met. I told my dad about the dream and he mentioned that she was very softly-spoken and a gentle personality, too. So, I do feel that it was a visitation from her.

Do you want to know how your deceased loved ones might be communicating with you, too?

Next up, I’m going to give you a comprehensive list of how you can know if your deceased loved one (in this article, I‘m going to shorten this term to d.l.o.) is already communicating with you, and then I’m going to give you a full list of tips for encouraging communication with them, if you’re not seeing any communication or much at all.

So, here are all the common ways in which our deceased loved ones tend to communicate with us:

Flickering lights & problems with electrics

Yes, d.l.o’s can interfere with electrics. When I lived in New Zealand, I noticed I was getting a lot of flickering lights in my house, and it went on for about 3 weeks. A medium I saw around this time told me that my great-grandmother, Ida Sayce, was around me, and that she said she was making my lights flicker to make her presence felt. I hadn’t even mentioned the lights to the medium, so that was pretty cool.

Feathers & Coins

If you’re finding feathers or coins on your path, especially in unusual places, then this can also be a sign that your deceased person is getting your attention. I was recently chatting online with a friend when I was in an airport waiting for a flight. She was telling me all about her partner who passed away several years ago. She told me that she sensed that she and him were going to meet again in a future life. I got the strong sense (intuitively) this would be the case, and felt tingles on my neck as I read the message (which is a sign Spirit is with me). Then in an empty (indoors) airport with no birds around, I had this feather blow past me and settle right at my feet in front of me. Feathers for me are a sign that Spirit is with me, so I felt like that was her deceased partner giving her a sign and I sent the photo of the feather to her.

You smell their fragrance

Maybe your deceased loved one wore a particular brand of perfume or they smelled like tobacco because they smoked. If you smell this odour around you and there’s no other source it could be coming from, that’s also a sign they are with you (by the way, this gift is called clairsalience .)

You have birds or butterflies around you that are behaving in unusual ways

Obviously not every time you see a bird or a butterfly is going to be your deceased loved one communicating with you. But if you are on a walk, thinking about your d.l.o. and you see a bird that follows you around on your walk, that’s a sign. Or if you see a butterfly and you’re thinking of your d.l.o., and butterflies have some significance for you spiritually, maybe that’s a sign, too. Basically, go on how YOU feel about it. If something feels significant, it likely is.

Physical sensations

A sign for me that Spirit is around is that I get tingling on my temples , near my eyes. This can happen on one side or both sides. I don’t just get this when a deceased spirit is around but also when I do readings and come into contact with other types of Spirit. This is a form of clairsentience and it is not uncommon for people to experience it when their deceased love one is hanging around. It can manifest in different ways — it won’t necessarily always manifest as tingling or on the temples, like mine does. It could be on your back or on the back of your legs, for example (both common spots.) It could also be a physical sensation like pressure or feel like someone is touching you when there is no-one there.

You just get the sense they are with you

This one is hard to describe. Maybe you just feel like they are so close that they are in the room with you, or maybe you feel like you’re not alone and being watched (but not in a creepy way).

Your/their special song comes on the radio

Maybe there is a song that reminds you of your d.l.o., or perhaps there was a song that was ‘your’ song, that you both enjoyed listening to, when you were together. If this song comes on the radio (especially if it is not a song that comes on the radio too often, and it happens at a significant moment), this could also be a sign.

Objects are moving around and you’re not moving them

Perhaps a photo of your d.l.o. keeps getting knocked off the wall, or some other item that you associate with your deceased loved one is showing up in odd places or where it shouldn’t. And no-one else put it there. Deceased spirits do have the power to move matter (although not all spirits are capable of it) so if this is happening, it could also be a sign.

You see angel lights or things moving in the corner of your eye

Sometimes I see golden/white/blue/pinks lights that are a bit like fireworks, in my peripheral vision. They go off in a flash but if I look at them directly, they’re gone. For me, this is a sign that a spirit is nearby or trying to get my attention, and I call them ‘ angel lights ‘ because they are sometimes associated with angels, too. I go through phases with how often I see these lights, sometimes I can go months without seeing one, but if it’s been a while and I see one while thinking about someone who is deceased, for me that’s a sign that that person is with me.

Seeing things moving in the corner of your eye can also be a sign that a deceased loved one is with you. Equally, this could be a sign of an earthbound spirit . Seeing something moving in the corner of your eye should feel comforting, not creepy. If it’s comforting, or is accompanied by some other positive feeling, it’s likely to be your d.l.o.

Conversely, if it creeps you out, and you suspected anyway that you had earthbound spirits around you or in your space, you might need some techniques to clear them (see my book The Empath’s Toolkit for a technique to clear earthbound spirits from your aura.)

OK, back to signs that your loved one is with you:

It’s the anniversary of their death, or your wedding anniversary

All of the above signs are extra significant, if they happen on or around the anniversary of the person’s death, or on another significant date, such as their birthday or your wedding anniversary (if the deceased loved one was your spouse.) In my experience, d.l.o.’s are even more likely to communicate at those times.

So now I’ve gone into some signs that your loved one with with you. What if you don’t see any of these signs but you want to encourage them to check in?

Here are some ideas to encourage communication with them:

Pay attention most of all to your dreams

Dreams are the easiest way for our d.l.o’s to communicate with us, simply because channelling the deceased is like building a bridge. You live in different worlds. You’re in the earthly world and they are on the ‘other side’. To communicate with them, you have to (energetically speaking) build a bridge to their world, and they need to build a bridge to yours. When you dream, you visit the astral planes, which are like a halfway house between the earthly realm, and the ‘other side’. And so this makes it easier for your d.l.o. to get through to you, because they can pop into a dream more easily than they can, say move matter in the physical realm. And it also makes it easier for you to pick up a message because you’re in such a receptive state when you’re asleep and dreaming.

ASK them to make their presence felt 

This sounds really obvious but asking them to communicate with you can get the ball rolling. Speak their name, and say it out loud that you want to hear from them. If you’re someone who spooks easily, ask them not to knock your stuff over and startle you!

Develop your psychic abilities

Our deceased loved ones will use any available channels to communicate with us, including our clairvoyance , clairaudience , clairsentience , or claircognizance . Developing and sensitising these clairs gives them more opportunities to contact you. For example, if you develop your clairvoyance, you’re more likely to see the ‘angel lights’ I mentioned above as a sign from your d.l.o.

(If you’d like some help developing your clairs, I have a free e-course at the top of my free resources page .)

Play a song (or songs) that you used to listen to together, or that remind you of the person in question

This can draw your d.l.o closer to you. Doing this before bed may even bring them to you in a dream.

Keep their photo close by

If you haven’t got a photo of your deceased loved one on display in your house, get one up. Keeping a photo next to the bed, may also bring their spirit closer to you when you’re asleep and dreaming.

Hold something that belonged to your person and think about him/her (preferably while you meditate)

Doing that daily or a few times per week can call their spirit in to you.

Visit their grave

This might not be possible at the moment, depending on your circumstances, but they will know you have visited, and it will draw them closer to you.

Ask your friends/family to be aware

If your d.l.o. is not able to get through to you, sometimes he/she will take advantage of another person’s openness, so ask your sensitive or intuitive loved ones or friends to tell you if they have a dream involving your deceased person.

This happened to a friend of mine who lost her husband a few years ago. She was in a situation where she really wished she could talk a situation over with him, that was happening in her life at the time. She would have wanted his input. So, she asked him to come into her dreams or communicate with her, but didn’t get a message from him. I didn’t even know she asked him to communicate, but that night he came into my dreams. He didn’t say anything, I just had a dream where I felt his presence strongly. I messaged her about it in the morning and she felt it was meaningful, especially as she had particularly wanted to hear from him, at that time. Perhaps he hadn’t been able to get through to her for whatever reason and so tried another option.

So. make sure to ask any friends/family who are open to it, to let you know if they dream of your deceased person. Sometimes they won’t tell you if you don’t ask, and then you can miss a message right when you need it.

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Visitation Dreams — How to Tell If They Are Real…

How to tell the difference between true visitation dreams and regular dreams.

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This type of experience with my loved ones is not out of the ordinary, and it doesn’t make me special; in fact, visitation dreams are one of the most common ways for spirits to reach out to their loved ones after they have died.

Dream visitations offer proof that even after death, souls live on and through dreams they have a way to communicate with their loved ones still alive in the physical.

Not every dream about a dead loved one is a direct communication from them though, so how can you tell if your dream means your loved one has actually reached out, or whether it is just a creation from your subconscious mind?

The good news is there are some simple ways to tell.

Lets look first at “regular dreams”.

Most of your dreams are creations of your subconscious mind, when your conscious mind is asleep. An easy way to understand how regular dreams work is by thinking of them as movies, and your subconscious mind as the director.

In a dream, your subconscious mind has a general theme, lesson, or idea to communicate and so it selects dream characters to play out the scenario. Your subconscious selects the dream characters based on all the people you have met in your life or in past lives, (whether you consciously remember them or not doesn’t matter).

Sometimes deceased loved ones do play roles as dream characters… These are not visitation dreams. Your subconscious mind needs a loving grandmotherly figure, and so your grandmother, although deceased, plays the dream character role because her personality and how you perceive her helps your subconscious mind to depict the story through your dream.

Many people are quick to brush off visitation dreams, as something similar to the above. Or they think the dream is a result of that person being on the top of mind, and a result of grieving, and not a direct and real communication from beyond the physical.

I know in my heart, that my visitation dreams from both my grandparents were very real, and I’m excited to share some characteristics of real visitation dreams which you can look for to determine if your dreams about lost loved ones were actually a real after death communication.

What Is A Visitation Dream?

A visitation dream is not a creation from your subconscious mind… Visitation dreams are when a non physical being communicates with you while you are sleeping. There are many reasons why they communicate while you’re sleeping rather than awake… The main one is that your ego mind doesn’t block the communication, and so it is much easier for your loved one to get past the filters of your mind which are always working on some level to keep you focused in the physical, and as a result block out activity from the spiritual realms.

Dreams of dead loved ones are the most common type of visitation dreams, though I have also had visitation dreams from angels and spirit guides, which means you can too.

True visitation dreams are much different from regular dreams, for starters they are usually very real, vivid and you will feel that you have been visited by your deceased loved one.

Also, with true visitations from spirit through dreams, you will feel and know in your heart that the dream was a real communication.

When it comes to regular dreams, they’re easy to forget, but with a true dream visitation it will be vivid and real, and you’ll probably remember it for the rest of your life.

When my grandparents contacted me through the dream state, I saw them as completely healed, vibrantly well, and perfect. If your loved one appears to you through a dream in this way, this is a key sign of a true visitation. They are now fully reconnected with Source, and the light of God, so any anger, fear energy, or disease will be gone when they contact you through the dream state.

True visitation dreams involve a clear communication from beyond the physical. It doesn’t have to be in words, and often will be completely telepathic… But when beings in spirit visit you in your dreams, they will clearly and to the point convey their message.

Visitation dreams aren’t long and drawn out… They are usually simple, to the point, incredibly real, powerful, and then they are gone.

Most often, based on my experience and on the visitation dreams other people I know have had, the communication is focused on reassurance, forgiveness, healing, and to let you know they are ok. If there is some warning your loved one has for you, it too will be too the point, and then backed with reassurance and a feeling of love and support through their presence.

Finally, when you wake up from a visitation dream, you may be overcome with a feeling of love, peace, and gratitude. You will know you have been visited by your loved one who is now in spirit.

If this happens to you, trust that a real dream visitation has occurred; know that your loved one is well, and that even after death they offer their love, reassurance, and support from beyond the physical.

If you do feel like you’re being visited in your dreams by a lower vibrational entity, this too is possible, but does not serve you and can easily be prevented through psychic protection! Call upon Archangel Michael and your guardian angels to surround you with light while you sleep to keep any unwanted and negative beings away.

You can learn more about psychic protection here.

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• Dream Interpretation

What Are Visitation Dreams? Meaning, Characteristics & How to Cope

Last Updated: February 28, 2024 Fact Checked

What are visitations in dreams?

• Characteristics
• How to Cope

Expert Interview

This article was reviewed by Stina Garbis and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau . Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary. There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 7,510 times.

You’ve recently seen a strangely lifelike vision of a deceased loved one in a dream , but why? Are they trying to tell you something? Visitation dreams are vivid dreams that are thought to facilitate communication between you and a loved one who has since passed on . Though they may be unsettling initially, they're also believed to bring you peace, guidance, relief, and closure. Some believe there’s a spiritual meaning behind visitation dreams while others don’t—but if you’re curious, then keep reading. We’ll tell you everything you need to know about visitation dreams, their characteristics, and how to cope with them.

Things You Should Know

• Visitations in dreams are believed to be a deceased loved one’s attempt at reaching out to you . They’re vivid, sometimes lucid dreams that involve interacting with a loved one.
• If you have a visitation dream, it may mean you’re struggling with grief or trauma, dealing with stress, or facing a big milestone in your life and wishing for guidance.
• Cope with dream visitations by journaling about them after waking up. Talk to a trusted friend about your dream, or get a therapist’s help if the dreams unsettle you.

• Anyone (or anything) may visit you in your dreams if they were a significant presence in your life—from a relative (like a grandmother or great-uncle) to a dear friend or even a beloved pet .
• Keep in mind that the idea of dreams carrying messages from deceased loved ones isn’t verified medically or scientifically. Rather, it’s a spiritual belief that some embrace and others don’t.
• Psychologists and grief counselors often see visitation dreams as evidence of a person’s grief (but not necessarily as spiritual communication).

Characteristics of a Visitation Dream

• For example, if you wake up asking yourself whether you were just dreaming (because it all seemed so real), you likely had a visitation dream.
• Visitation dreams are also thought to be more memorable than the average dream. Because they’re so vivid, you may be able to picture them clearly for a long time after having them.

• For example, if you saw your grandmother in a visitation dream, you might dream about her giving you a loving look while standing beside you—as if to communicate that she was still looking out for you.
• Some people report being able to lucid dream while being visited by a deceased loved one—though not all visitation dreams necessarily involve lucid dreaming.

• From a spiritual perspective, the deceased loved one appears calm and happy because they’re thought to have reconnected with whatever God, gods, or spiritual energies they believed in while alive. They’re “whole” once more.

• Many visitation dreams are thought to have a reassuring message. For example, some claim to have dreams in which a loved one says they’re okay or in a better place—or they just want you to be happy.
• Some visitation dreams may carry a warning from a loved one, although it’s thought to be much less common than reassuring dreams.

• Though seeing a deceased loved one in your dreams may feel strange, visitation dreams are also often associated with feelings of peace and comfort when you wake up.

What do visitation dreams mean?

• For example, you might dream of a deceased loved one looking happy because they’re trying to show you that they’re proud of you or believe you’re on the right path in life.

• In short, visitation dreams are thought to be your loved one’s way of saying that it’s okay to let go and release whatever you’re holding onto!

• For example, the recent loss of a loved one might have you worrying about another aging family member or your own health. So, you might have a visitation dream about them trying to bring you some reassurance.

• However, remember that visitation dreams shouldn’t be your main source of socialization. In fact, they may be a sign to start reaching out to the people still in your life and form closer connections with them!

• Remember, grief can look different for everyone, and working through it isn’t always a straightforward process.
• In other words, it’s very normal to experience a wide range of emotions while you process grief.

How to Cope with Visitation Dreams

• “A comforting memory of my loved one is…”
• “Today I’m really missing…”
• “When I feel overwhelmed by pain or despair, I will…”

• Remember: there’s no need to be afraid of your visitation dreams, even if you find them unsettling. It’s believed that visitation dreams are there to help you.
• If you don’t mind your visitation dreams or even find them soothing, the easiest thing to do may be to relax and let them come rather than stress about their meaning! After all, getting a good night’s sleep is the most important thing.

• Repeat this several times until you feel calm!
• To do progressive muscle relaxation , simply focus on relaxing the muscles in your body one by one, systematically releasing the tension from your feet up to your head (or, if you prefer, the other way around).

• For example, try writing a letter to your loved one and ask for their help if you feel you might need it. You could say something like, “Dear Grandpa, please look out for me as I start a new job this week.”
• In tough times, you might even consider asking your deceased loved ones for peace and protection. Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, it may feel comforting to think of them as guardians watching over you.

• Alternatively, if you don’t want to consult a spiritual counselor, try educating yourself on the meaning of visitation dreams instead!
• For example, books on dream interpretation may give you some added insight into your dreams and their spiritual significance.

• Essentially, continuing bonds therapy validates the idea that it’s normal to carry your loved one’s memory with you throughout life and that maintaining a connection with them may help you cope with your loss .
• It’s thought to be particularly helpful to people who are distraught after a significant loss in their life—and may help you process feelings of grief.

• In rare cases, you may find yourself dreaming about the manner of your loved one’s death (particularly if it was a traumatic loss, like a sudden accident or caused by an act of violence).
• If your dreams involve reliving the trauma of your loved one’s passing, a grief counselor can also help you sort through and process those memories in a healthier way.

Expert Q&A

You Might Also Like

Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about astrology, check out our in-depth interview with Kari Samuels .

• ↑ https://thepleasantdream.com/visitation-dream/
• ↑ https://dreamclarify.org/loved-one-visitation-dreams/
• ↑ https://dreams.ucsc.edu/168/deceased_loved_ones.html
• ↑ https://journeyintodreams.com/visitation-dreams/
• ↑ https://www.worldofdreams.com/dream-dictionary/dreaming-of-dead-people-or-relatives/
• ↑ https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/grief-loss
• ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/relaxation-techniques-breath-control-helps-quell-errant-stress-response
• ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/how-to-overcome-griefs-health-damaging-effects
• ↑ https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/sjp.12462

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8 Characteristics of Visitation Dreams

Why do deceased loved ones come to us in our dreams?

Deceased loved ones who have crossed to the Light can and do visit us in our dreams.  These types of dreams are often referred to as “visitation dreams,” and they can provide us with great comfort.

It is actually easier for spiritual entities of all kinds (e.g., deceased loved ones, guides, angels) to communicate with us while we are sleeping. 

Why?  Because when sleeping, we are in that “in between place” between our Earthly reality and “the other side” (the spiritual world).  During this time, our rational mind and our ego are not engaged.  Things can happen in our dream world that we would normally stop or discount while awake.

For example, when someone who has died comes to visit us in our dreams, we aren’t as likely to have the “rational thought” that this person is actually dead and shouldn’t be in our dream.  When they appear, we accept that person’s presence without argument.

Is every dream a visitation dream?

Although I would love to say that you are having a visitation dream every time your beloved Grandfather Lou appears in a dream, this is not the case.  Why?  Here is how most of our “everyday dreams” are created:

Think of your dream as a play or a movie.  Your subconscious mind is the director that must select who will play the different roles.  You might need someone to play the role of a businessman. If your beloved Grandfather Lou was a successful businessman, then he may be selected.  Or perhaps the role requires a loving mother figure; then perhaps your Mother Beatrix is chosen because she was a very loving presence in your life when you were a child.

Based on all the people you have known during your lifetime (even those you may not consciously remember and possibly even people from past lives), the director (i.e., our unconscious) selects the best actor for that part.  Sometimes the actor who is selected is alive; sometimes the actor has passed.  But the actor is simply “the best person for the job” because he or she fits the requirements you need for that dream.

8 characteristics of true visitation dreams

NOTE: If you would like me to confirm that your dream is a true visitation dream or you would like my help interpreting your dream, please set up a brief Training or Mentoring Session by completing the “Interested Form” at the bottom of that page.

True “visitation dreams” are actually very easy to identify because they are very different than “everyday dreams.” Characteristics of most (but not all) visitation dreams include the following:

• Characteristic #1:   The most important characteristic of a true visitation dream is that it feels “real.”  It will also be very vivid.
• Characteristic #2:  If you have to ask whether the visitation dream was really a visitation dream, then it probably was NOT a visitation dream.  They are so real and vivid that you won’t have to ask this question.  When you do have a visitation dream, you may wonder if it was truly real; but in your heart or gut, you will “know” it was real.
• Characteristic #3:  Because they are so real and so vivid, you will remember visitation dreams very clearly for days, months, years . . . probably for your entire lifetime!
• Characteristic #4:   The deceased person (or deceased animal) will almost always appear in the dream to be completely healthy and behaving in a loving manner.  It would be very unusual if they appeared to be sick or injured.  They will never be angry, disappointed, depressed, or punishing.  Because they are now reconnected with God/Source/Spirit energy, they will be “whole, complete, and perfect.”
• Characteristic #5: Whether or not they speak to you verbally in the dream, they will communicate very clearly.  (NOTE:  As you’ll see in the next two examples, in neither of the dreams did actual verbal communication occur. Even though the messages were conveyed to me telepathically, they were completely clear.)
• Characteristic #6:   When they do communicate (either verbally or non-verbally), it isn’t because they want to engage in idle “chit-chat.”  It isn’t easy for deceased loves ones to enter a dream.  They come with a purpose, and they will convey the message and then be gone. It is very likely that you will wish the dream lasted longer.
• Characteristic #7:   Most often, their messages fall into the category of “reassurance.”  They come to let you know that they are fine and that they want you to be happy.  Occasionally, they will come with a warning; however, when giving a warning, they will give you loving support and you will feel reassured by their presence.
• Characteristic #8:   After a visitation dream, when you wake up, you will often be filled with a sense of peace and love.

EXAMPLE #1: Visitation dream with a person

I had a visitation dream from my mother about 30 years ago, and I can still recall it vividly to this day.  My mother passed when I was only 17 years old, and at the time of this writing, I’m 64. 

This visitation dream occurred during a time when I was undergoing a great deal of stress and was worried about what was going to happen.  The dream was set in the house where we last lived together, although it didn’t look exactly the same (e.g., the ceiling/roof was transparent). 

In the dream, there was a tree located behind the house that, in real life, didn’t exist.  There was a huge storm raging outside the house, and the wind was uprooting this very large tree. It was about to crash through the roof and onto the place where I was standing.  The tree was so large that I knew there was no way I could move out of the way in time. 

At that point in the dream, my mother appeared a short distance in front of me.  We were facing each other.  She suddenly held her hands above her head in an open Y shape.  I watched in fear as the tree came crashing through the roof toward us both.  But before it hit us, the tree split into two pieces and fell on either side of us. 

From the moment she appeared in the dream, she was staring into my eyes.  She didn’t say a word, but she very clearly communicated to me that all would be well in my waking world, and she was going to do what she could to protect me during this stressful time in my life.

EXAMPLE #2: Visitation dream with an animal

Another visitation dream involved my 16.5 year old cat, Yoda. It occurred a few days after I had to make the difficult decision to help her cross The Rainbow Bridge to the other side.

• NOTE: For more information about losing a pet and what life is like for animals on the other side, please refer to my Blog post Saying Goodbye to Our Beloved Pets – The Rainbow Bridge & Waiting at the Door .

In the dream, I woke up to find my hand on a cat’s back.  I felt the soft fur and assumed it was my other cat, Magic.  But when I looked down, it was Yoda. 

Even though I was dreaming, I realized that Yoda was dead.  I looked at her quizzically and asked silently how this could be.  She looked up at me with great love. It was then that I realized that she didn’t look like she looked when I last saw her.  Her coat was soft and glossy.  She was a normal weight. 

But the most important difference in her appearance were her eyes. (NOTE: Notice how my mother’s eyes were also important in the last dream.)   Yoda had been a semi-feral cat.  She was terrified of everyone and everything.  Even with me (the one person she allowed to be close to her), Yoda’s eyes had always been filled with apprehension and tension.  In the dream, her eyes showed only love and peacefulness.  And unlike in life, her body was relaxed and calm. 

Her eyes and body language communicated to me that she was fine now.  This dream felt so real that when I eventually woke up, I was sure that if I looked down beside me, Yoda would be there.  From that point on, I have felt totally at peace about my decision to assist her passing.

Can you ask for a visitation dream? 

Yes, you certainly can!  Before going to sleep, spend time thinking about the deceased loved one and ask him or her to come visit you in your dream state.  You may also want to ask your guides or other spiritual helpers to assist this person to come to you clearly.

However, please don’t become discouraged if the person doesn’t come to you.  They want to come visit, but there are many reasons why a deceased loved one may not show up when requested.  For example, the soul may be relatively new at entering dreams and may not know how to do it (yet).  Or your guides know that you want to know something that your deceased loved one can’t tell you because you need to find the answer for yourself.

But there’s no harm in asking for him or her to come visit with you!  And when visitation dreams do occur, be sure to thank your deceased loved one for coming and send them love and gratitude for taking the time to visit with you.

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Experts explain what it means when someone who died is alive in your dream.

Dreaming of someone being alive after they've died can stir up a range of emotions—and they're not uncommon dreams to have. From feeling comforted by the sight of them, to reliving the grief all over again once you wake up, what do these dreams mean?

Like all dream scenarios , the meaning can vary quite a bit depending on context. Here, experts explain what these dreams could mean, what to do about them, and how to know if it was a visitation dream.

What does it mean to see a dead person alive in a dream?

According to therapist and dream expert  Leslie Ellis, Ph.D. , dreams following the death of a loved one, be it a pet or a person, are quite common. "They are not always comforting, but they do seem to move the grief process forward," she says.

And typically, grief is exactly what these dreams are all about. In fact, one study by dream researcher Joshua Black, Ph.D. on dreaming about deceased loved ones showed these dreams can actually help us  process the trauma of a loss , serving as a way to maintain connection with the deceased, and/or help regulate emotions.

These are essential components of grieving , Ellis explains, adding, "One of the most interesting things is, when we lose a loved one or pet, the vast majority of the dreams we have about them are comforting."

Of course, the aren't always comforting, so here are some more interpretations depending on the specifics of your dream.

If you're grieving

As professional dream analyst  Lauri Loewenberg  previously told mindbodygreen, her clients often feel comforted when a deceased loved one appears in a dream, and these dreams help with the grieving process. This echoes Ellis' and Black's idea that dreaming of someone who's passed is a natural part of the grieving process.

"When it's in the first couple of years after their death, and if it's someone you're very close to, it can still be connected to the grief. And it's really common," Loewenberg says.

If they're mad at you in the dream

Now, if the person in the dream is angry with you—don't worry. It's likely not a negative visitation dream about some grudge before they died. According to Loewenberg, rather, dreaming that someone who died is angry, upset, or disappointed in you are most likely projections of your own feelings.

"If they're mad at you, for example, it's not their spirit coming through. This is you being mad at yourself for some reason," she says, adding that these types of dreams are common if you feel you had unfinished business with this person or things left unsaid, and/or they died suddenly.

If they try to hurt you

In some cases, you might dream that a person who died is alive again and attacking you. In this instance, Loewenberg notes, this likely represents a self-sabotaging part of yourself that's exhibiting similar patterns or behaviors as this person did when they were alive.

She suggests asking yourself if you're doing anything you know is self-sabotaging, or if there's something this person struggled with that you're doing now, whether it's frivolous spending, a substance abuse problem, or avoiding a difficult conversation.

If the dream is pleasant

According to both Ellis and Loewenberg, many of the dreams we have about people who have died are pleasant, and can assist in the grieving process as we work through our emotions around the person's death.

These dreams can be related to the grief you're still processing, but can also act almost like a fulfillment of your wishes—the wish being to see this person again.

There's also a chance it could be a visitation dream—which while not particularly common, is still a possibility—bringing us to our next point.

If it's a visitation dream

According to clairvoyant and medium Catharine Allan , "If the person is happy and at peace in the dream, maybe talking to you or showing you something, and you wake up feeling calm, it could have been a visitation from them. And those are the best dreams of all."

Additionally, as both Ellis and Loewenberg note, visitation dreams feel distinctly different from your average, everyday dreams. For one thing, Loewenberg says, the person (or pet) probably looks great, healthy, radiant even. Ellis adds when she was visited by Shadow, her cat who had recently passed, his coat was shiny and he looked to be in great shape.

How to work through this dream

In the case of a visitation dream, there's nothing to necessarily  do  besides take comfort in the fact that you feel your loved one reached out to your through the dreamworld. Loewenberg says you could also write it down in a  dream journal  and keep it in a safe place to treasure it going forward.

In other cases, she says, "it's definitely a call from your subconscious to try to come to terms with what's going on." Whether it's a feeling of unfinished business or not being able to accept they've passed, it's important to find a way to accept whatever it is.

One great practice for this, she says, is to write them a letter telling them everything you never got the chance to say when they were alive. You can also do your best to look for a lesson if you feel there were things unsaid, and "moving forward in your life, to never let things get to that point again with anyone you care about," she adds.

"When these dream figures keep returning, it brings a sense of continuity of connection," Ellis says, adding that toward the end of life, lost loved ones often come to help ease the  life-death transition . "So while grief dreams can be painful, most often they help us through the pain of loss," she says.

What is the meaning of dead person alive in dream?

These dreams most often relate to processing the grief and emotions associated with their death.

What does it mean when you dream of someone who has passed?

When you dream of someone who's passed, especially shortly after they died, it typically relates to your own feelings of grief and wanting to see them again.

The takeaway

Grief is never a linear process, and dreaming about a person who died can bring up all those feelings again. Try to find comfort in the dream if you believe you were visited, and if not, there's likely another message within the dream that can help you move through your grief to reach a place of peace and acceptance.

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How Dreams of Deceased Loved Ones Affect the Dreamers

What messages do visitation dreams convey.

Posted December 4, 2016 | Reviewed by Lybi Ma

• Why Is Sleep Important?
• Find a sleep therapist near me
• Visitation dreams are often much more intense, vivid, and kinesthetic than ordinary dreams.
• The deceased frequently appear in visitation dreams conveying reassurance, love, and joy.
• Some people who have had visitation dreams report that the experience helped them with the process of grieving.

Many years ago, shortly after my friend Janet passed away, I had a vivid and intense dream about her. During her life, Janet was disabled and wheelchair-bound. In my dream, however, I saw her moving freely and joyfully. She looked young and healthy. Her entire body basked in radiant light, and she smiled warmly at me. Happy to see her, I exclaimed, “Janet, you look beautiful!” and reached out to touch her face. The instant I made contact, I woke up, trembling in amazement. I knew that a profound experience had just taken place.

Clinical psychologist Jennifer Shorter defines visitation dreams as “striking emotionally intense dreams in which a recently deceased loved one returns to provide guidance, reassurance, and/or warning.” These experiences are unique, powerful, and sometimes life-changing.

Based on multiple studies [1][2][3][4] , here are eight common characteristics of visitation dreams, with references from my books, Visitation Dreams of Deceased Loved Ones: Understanding Their Meaning & Transformative Power and How to Interpret Your Dreams: Keys to Insight & Empowerment .

1. “It feels so real.”

One of the most common descriptions of visitation dreams is that they are much more intense, vivid, and kinesthetic than ordinary dreams. “It feels so real” is a common refrain, characterizing experiences both during and after the dream. The intensity of the dream may stay with the dreamer for months or even years as if the dream had happened only recently.

2. The deceased appear healthy and vibrant.

Typically, the deceased appear in visitation dreams not in their ill, frail, or anguished states. Instead, they show themselves as healthy, vibrant, and younger in appearance.

3. The deceased convey reassurance .

The deceased also frequently appear in visitation dreams conveying reassurance, love, and joy. The reassurance can be both that the deceased is okay, and that the one who’s dreaming will also be okay.

4. The deceased convey important messages .

The deceased in visitation dreams often come with important messages for the dreamer. They may impart wisdom , life lessons, reminders (warnings), or other helpful guidance.

5. The deceased communicate telepathically.

In many cases, the deceased will appear in visitation dreams communicating telepathically and/or symbolically rather than verbally. Without words, the dreamer is able to clearly understand the message of the deceased loved one.

6. The dreamer awakens with intense emotions .

Those who experience visitation dreams often awaken feeling strong, usually positive emotions. In addition to a vivid sense that the dream was “real,” one may also feel love, joy, relief, sadness, or pensive.

7. The dreamer experiences closure .

Some people who have had visitation dreams report that the experience helped them with the process of grieving. Following the dream, they were able to cope better with loss, achieve closure, and move on in their lives.

8. The dreamer is changed by the experience .

Perhaps the most striking aspect of visitation dreams is that they can transform the life perspective of the dreamer. Many people who have had visitation dreams report a stronger interest in the larger, existential questions of life, as well as a greater desire to explore spiritual purpose and meaning. These include cases where the dreamer had little or no interest in such matters prior to the visitation dream.

“Six weeks after his death my father appeared to me in a dream. Suddenly he stood before me and said that he was coming back from his holiday. He had made a good recovery and was now coming home. I thought he would be annoyed with me for having moved into his room. But not a bit of it!...It was an unforgettable experience, and it forced me for the first time to think about life after death.” — Carl Jung [5]

© 2016 by Preston C. Ni. All rights reserved worldwide. Copyright violation may subject the violator to legal prosecution.

(1) Shorter, Jennifer E. Visitation Dreams in Grieving Individuals: A Phenomenological Inquiry Into the Relationship Between Dreams and the Grieving Process. Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. (2010)

(2) Barrett, Deirdre. Through a Glass Darkly: The Dead Appear in Dreams. OMEGA: The Journal of Death and Dying. (1991)

(3) Garfield, Patricia. Dreams in Bereavement. From the Anthology Trauma and Dreams. Harvard University Press (2001)

(4) Krippner, Stanley & Faith, Laura. Exotic Dreams: A Cross-Cultural Study Dreaming: Journal of the Association for the Study of Dreams. (2001)

(5) Jung, Carl G. Memories, Dreams, Reflections. Pantheon Books/ Random House. (1963)

Preston Ni is a professor, presenter, private coach, and the author of Communication Success with Four Personality Types and How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People.

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• Coping With Grief

‘Visitation Dreams’ and Other Ways a Deceased Loved One Might Visit You

Updated 12/28/2023

Published 08/20/2020

Dr. Alejandra Vasquez, JD, CT

Certified Grief Counselor

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

It can feel downright unsettling and supernatural to have a deceased loved one visit you in your dreams. It can make it seem as if you’ve had a visit from the other side, which can be exhilarating, confusing, and sometimes a bit scary. It’s also not something we fully understand, as the entire notion of deceased loved ones visiting in dreams has yet to take hold in the scientific or medical community.

Jump ahead to these sections:

What are ‘visitation dreams’ or ‘big dreams’, why do we have ‘visitation dreams’ about deceased loved ones, tips for coping with visitation dreams.

• When a Loved One Dies, Do They Visit You in Other Ways?

When someone you love dies , you may experience different stages and types of grief that may lead you to have these types of dreams. Visitation dreams can sometimes provide comfort and healing to the bereaved. They’re also a window to the possibility of life after death and spirit communication.

Post-planning tip: If you are the executor for a deceased loved one, it's tough to handle both the emotional and technical aspects of their unfinished business without a way to organize your process. We have a post-loss checklist  that will help you ensure that your loved one's family, estate , and other affairs are taken care of.

Visitation dreams are dreams in which a deceased loved one appears before you. They get their name because they're so vivid that you can confuse them for a visit from that person's ghost or spirit. 

Such dreams may help you cope with your grief , loss, and sorrow. However, science hasn’t found a way to quantify them. Usually, they’re attributed to issues related to brain chemistry and derailed sleep cycles.

Because science has no explanation, and religious and spiritual texts only refer to them in unverifiable parables, the medical community has not taken visitation dreams seriously. Instead, medicine generally leaves it up to parapsychologists and ghost hunters to give them some kind of meaning. 

On the other hand, psychologists and grief counselors see dreams in which your deceased loved ones communicate with you differently. While they’re not necessarily messages from the other side, they are validation of your personal grief. 

The famed psychologist Carl Jung coined the term “ Big Dreams ” to describe experiences like visitation dreams. He believed in his years of research that when a person dreams of their deceased loved ones, it’s a reflection of a person’s insight into different spiritual levels. Jung separates these episodes of profound significance from typical “little dreams.” 

Some psychologists who’ve worked with patients having visitation dreams agree that there are specific characteristics attributed to them. Their notes regarding the commonalities found in these dreams are not part of a formal study. Instead, they’re observations of several encounters as reported by patients.

Here are some characteristics of visitation dreams:

•  They feel real .
•  They seem authentic.
•  Your deceased loved one(s) visit.
•  They have a purpose.
•  They convey clear messages.
•  They are reassuring and calming.
•  They can warn of danger.
•  They comfort you.
•  They leave you feeling peaceful.
•  You feel as if your loved one was there.

None of us know precisely why we have visitation dreams. Some people view them as signs from deceased loved ones . They believe that your loved ones use the relaxed state of consciousness induced by sleep as a gateway into your subconscious mind, making it easier to communicate with you when you're sleeping. 

The psychology community sees these dreams as more of a coping mechanism that the mind manufactures to help deal with the pain and sorrow of grief . 

Some would like to believe we experience visitation dreams because there are angels who protect us from harm or come to forewarn us. Others believe that our deceased loved ones are still living among us, only in a different realm or dimension. Whatever the reason for these dreams, know that you don’t generally have to be afraid of them. 

Sometimes, a bereaved person may feel distressed when they have visitation dreams . The following tips will help you cope with them so that you can learn to not only deal with them but better control them:

• Regulate your emotions
• Maintain a continuing bond with your loved one
• Increase your sense of hope and encouragement 

1. Don’t be afraid

Generally speaking, there’s no need to fear when you have vivid dreams about your deceased loved ones. This fact is reflected in the soothing, positive nature of most visitation dreams.

However, your situation may feel different in the wake of a loved one’s traumatic death. In these circumstances, you may repeatedly relive the unpleasant details of that death in your mind. That’s just as true when you’re asleep as when you’re awake.

As a result, your dreams may vividly recall the manner of your loved one’s death or otherwise disturb you. The desire to avoid such an experience is perfectly understandable. If you’re afraid of repeatedly seeing traumatic images of your deceased loved one in your dreams, consult a grief counselor for help.  

2. Treat it as a gift

Visitation dreams don’t happen to everyone. Sometimes, a person may be yearning to see their deceased loved one, but they can never get them to visit them in their dreams.

Others who might not want to get a visit from the other side may repeatedly dream of their deceased loved ones. Although it may be uncomfortable to get these types of dreams, consider them a gift that can stop at any time.

3. Seek counseling

When visitation dreams become disturbing, or you simply can’t understand why you’re dreaming about a deceased loved one, find a counselor who specializes in grief counseling or a psychologist trained in dream interpretation.

They can walk you through some of the reasons why this may be happening to you and bring clarity to your situation.

4. Try continuing bonds therapy

Continuing bonds therapy is a form of grief therapy that allows you to maintain the bond with your deceased loved one even after their death. This type of treatment can help when you are inconsolable over the loss of your loved one, particularly your child or spouse. 

Continuing bonds therapy was first introduced in 1996, in a book called Continuing Bonds: Another View of Grief . It went against traditional grief and bereavement models of treatment that required a bereaved person to detach from and let go of their deceased loved one. 

Instead of detaching from your loved ones when they die, the authors suggest that a bereaved person continues the bond with their loved one in different ways throughout their lifetime. This book and other books on grief may help you process your bereavement experiences in a way that makes more sense to you. 

5. Practice guided meditation

Guided meditation helps you to plan out your dreams ahead of time so that you are not surprised by them. When you learn to control what you dream about, you’ll have less dream anxiety and are better able to face these types of dream visitations. 

Guided meditation starts with setting time aside to sit quietly and contemplate on your deceased loved one. As you focus on your breath, allow your thoughts to go to memories of your loved one. You can practice recalling what they looked like, what they felt like, how they smelled, etc. Once you’re in a relaxed state of mind, guide your subconscious into your dream state with thoughts of your loved one in mind.

6. Ask your loved one to visit you

Sometimes you’ll want your deceased loved ones to visit you. It may be that you need to get advice from your grandfather, or you miss your mom and want to talk to her about your upcoming wedding plans.

You can make it a daily habit to speak to your loved ones and ask them to visit you in your dreams. 

7. Take notes

When you’re prepared to have these types of dreams, you’re better able to remember the details of things you want to talk about to your loved ones.

Leave a notepad by your bedside so that you can write down what you want to address with them in your dreams. Note-taking can also help you remember the details of your conversations with departed loved ones upon waking. Most of the time, the messages received are hard to forget. 

8. Ask for peace and protection

If you’re facing a particularly tough situation, ask your deceased loved ones for peace and protection.

Whether you believe in angels or life after death, it may feel comforting to know that you have angels watching over you, protecting you from harm. 

9. Explore the meaning of dreams

Educate yourself about what’s happening to you by reading books on grief and dream interpretation.

The more you learn about why these things occur, the less anxious or fearful you’ll be to have these types of dreams.  

10. Seek religious or spiritual counseling

Religious or spiritual explanations are not for everyone. Depending on what your personal beliefs are, you may want to consider talking to a religious or spiritual leader about the dreams you’re having.

They can help you better understand them in this type of context as opposed to what medicine, science, or parapsychologists have to say about them. 

11. Allow these dreams to come

Relaxing into your dream state and allowing visitation dreams to come through without worrying too much about what they mean may give you much-needed rest rather than stressing over their more profound meaning.

When a Loved One Dies, Do They Visit You in Other Ways? 

Just as some people feel that their deceased loved ones visit them in their dreams, some also feel connected to those who have passed on in different ways. Here are some examples. 

Some people say they feel their loved ones are close when they smell a particular scent.

Butterflies or cardinals are often viewed to be symbolic of spiritual visitors. Some people see symbolic numbers repeated throughout life that remind them of their loved ones.

Other feelings

Some people say they can feel their loved one’s spiritual presence. They may feel a touch that can’t be explained – or see something move. 

When Your Loved Ones Visit in Dreams 

Visitation dreams are sometimes a welcome respite from longing or yearning for your loved one who has died. Whether you believe these dreams are real, from the divine, or something straight out of science fiction - a visit from the afterlife can be healing to your soul.

If you're looking for more about spirituality and the afterlife, read our guide on dreaming about death and the best spiritual books for beginners .

• "Dreams as a Source of Supernatural Agent Concepts." Frontiers in Psychology. March 19, 2015. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2015.00283/full
• "Big Dreams & Archetypal Visions." Dream Studies. November 14, 2008. https://dreamstudies.org/big-dreams-archetypal-visions/
• Barlé, N., Wortman, C. B., & Latack, J. A. (2017). Traumatic bereavement: Basic research and clinical implications. Journal of Psychotherapy Integration, 27(2), 127–139. Doi.org
• Klass, D., Silverman, P. R., & Nickman, S. L. (Eds.). (1996). Continuing bonds: New understandings of grief. Taylor & Francis.

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• Grief & Relationships

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10+ Meanings About Dreams Of Dead People (or Relatives) That Will Give You Some Comfort

• Written by Corinne Troussier
• Last Updated: October 18, 2023

What does it mean when you dream about a dead person, especially if it’s a dead relative or loved one? And how do you make sense of the experience? This article will take you through dream interpretation of this fairly common, yet often puzzling kind of dream. You will also find examples to help you understand how you can use the experience of the dream to bring about positive changes in your life.

Dead People Dream Meanings Revealed

Dreams of the dead and their psychological meaning.

Dreams about dead relatives or loved ones are often considered part of the grieving process. It is common to have this kind of dream in the first few months after their passing.

As Rebecca Cathcart  explains, “Back to life” or “visitation” dreams, as they are known among dream specialists and psychologists, are vivid and memorable dreams of the dead.”

The impact of this type of dream is such that they often fall into the category of dreams Carl Jung called “ big dreams “, that is dreams that have a profound influence on our life.

Grief dreams or dreams about people who have passed away may bring up issues that we cannot face consciously. They may be an opportunity to work through some unresolved emotional issues that remain.

In a more symbolic interpretation, the deceased person can represent a part of yourself that has died, been lost, or is difficult to accept. This is also pertinent in the interpretation of dreams about someone dying who is still alive .

What types of “grief dreams” or dreams of bereavement did you have?

Even though the literature relating to dreams experienced by the bereaved has grown in the last few decades, the study of dreams as a tool for coping with loss is a relatively new field of study.

Research suggests that the dreams of people who have lost loved ones are often very meaningful and important. According to the study “ The impact of dreams of the deceased on bereavement ”, 60% of respondents had the impression that their dream had an impact on the mourning process.

The same study examines the prevalent themes in grief dreams, which include “pleasant past memories or experiences, the deceased free of illness, memories of the deceased’s illness or time of death, the deceased in the afterlife appearing comfortable and at peace, and the deceased communicating a message.”

You may also recognize your dream in one of these categories of grief dreams:

• Visitation (being visited by a deceased loved one in your dream state)
• Message (the deceased communicating a message or feeling to you)
• Reassurance (reassurance that the person is at peace)
• Trauma (reliving of a bad memory, perhaps involving the moment of death)
• Faith (increased sense of spirituality because one is not alone in the world; the person is still there, just not in “physical” form).

In addition, one of the first in-depth study about dreams of bereavement conducted by Deirdre Barrett shows four main categories of dreams based on the type of interaction with the dead person in the dream, such as when the deceased:

• described the state of death
• delivered messages to the living
• sought to change the circumstances of their death
• gave loved ones a chance to say ‘goodbye.’

💬 Interpretation Tip

Dreams of the deceased may help with the mourning process

Grieving is a natural process, which everyone moves through at their own pace. It is not defined by a timeframe, although many people experience the same emotional stages. One of the most challenging tasks to do during this process is to adjust to life without our loved one.

This can be a powerful time for dreamwork. Dreams can offer symbols and metaphors to help you understand your feelings about the deceased person, in addition to your feelings about the loss.

If a deceased family member appears in your dream, it is likely that you are experiencing grief over their death. Dreams of the deceased can help with this process by providing a way of coping with complex emotions and thoughts that arise during bereavement.

A dream can be seen as a way of experiencing events in the imagination, and this allows the dreamer to work through grief issues in a safe place.

Dreams may offer reassurance that the loved one is ‘okay’ after death

If you have recently lost a relative, you may be comforted by dreaming about them. Such a dream can be very reassuring for many reasons, including the sense of being able to “get in touch” with lost loved ones and the feeling that there is still more work to do for them, that they are not gone forever.

Dreams may feature the deceased appearing well, happy or healthy, which is reassuring that they’re “okay” after death. Dreams, where the deceased person is well or happy, can be reassuring to the dreamer.

The dreamer has often had concerns that something bad happened to them, or that they still have work to do for the people who have died and a dream can provide reassurance about their condition.

Dreams may feature messages from deceased loved ones

Dreams about dead relatives may include fragments of actual conversations or messages that were relayed when the relative was alive. For example, a relative might speak to you in a dream or ask you for help in some way.

As noted in this study by William Domhoff , a leading expert on dreams, a large number of dreams about dead people involves the usage of a telephone: “One striking contingency of these “philosophic” death dreams is the frequent utilization of a telephone as the medium of interaction with the deceased person. Fifty-three percent of the dreams in this category involved telephone calls from the deceased person.”

Telephones or phone calls in dreams symbolize the idea of communication and bridge between various aspects of your psyche or dimensions of reality. This is why telephones often appear in dreams, especially dreams of the dead.

If a telephone appears in your dream of the deceased, it may be relaying or reminding you of a message that they told you while they were still alive.

Dreams may give you a chance to say goodbye to a loved one

Dreams often give us a chance to say or do things that we would never even consider doing in waking life. This can be a great opportunity to take your feelings about the loss and find some closure with the deceased loved one.

Sometimes it’s hard to express certain emotions out loud, especially those of grief and sorrow. Dreams about dead relatives can provide you with an outlet for your emotions in this sense, where you need not worry about how others will perceive you.

Dreams about a dead person can sometimes be like an emotional release point as if there was something that was buried inside of us when the person died and only now has come out through dreams and emotions.

Dreams may be a chance to resolve issues with the deceased

Dreams about the deceased may be a result of unresolved emotions and desires that cry out for resolution. This does not necessarily mean that these dreams are warnings, but it does mean that they could be signs that you need to address them.

If you were close to the one who has passed away, you may dream about how much you miss them. You may also dream about them because it is a way of resolving any issues that you had whilst they were alive.

The deceased relative as a guide or helper

A deceased relative could appear as a guide or adviser in dreams, and this can offer support for the bereaved. Dreams about dead relatives may offer guidance, reassurance and encouragement.

Dreams are often seen as a way of connecting with the deceased, as they offer a chance to interact with that person again in a dream-like setting and gain understanding from their perspective.

The dead person as a representation of a part of yourself that you are struggling to accept

The deceased in your dreams may represent aspects of yourself that you are having trouble with. When you dream about a dead relative, it may be because they symbolize an aspect of yourself that you are struggling to accept within yourself.

You might feel deeply guilty about some unresolved emotions or feelings, such as anger or resentment towards them. Dreams like these could be telling you that it is time to face up to your own feelings and perhaps resolve them once and for all.

The dreamer may also be searching for an aspect of his or her own personality that he or she feels has been neglected, ignored or disowned. The dead person in the dream may be a substitute for this latent part of ourselves that is calling out to us, waiting to grow up and become complete and capable of fulfilling its function in our lives once again.

Dreams about a deceased person may represent unresolved issues from your life experience

Dreaming of the dead or seeing deceased friends or family members in your dreams can involve unresolved feelings that you are unable to integrate or deal with. The meaning of this type of dream can be similar to dreams involving ghosts , as they symbolize events or emotions from your past that you are unable to resolve, come to terms with or accept as part of your life experience.

You may be longing for closure or have some unfinished business that you need to take care of before you are able to move on with your life. Seeing the dead in your dreams can be a way for you to finally deal with these emotions and move on with your life.

A symbol of values and qualities you lack or miss

A dream about dead people can be a symbol of characteristics that are missing in your waking life. If you dream about deceased loved ones, you might be yearning for a certain lost quality or characteristic from your life.

This is especially true if the “dead” person was someone who was older or wiser than you and had done or seen more in life than you have to date.

For example, having a dream about your loving grandmother who is deceased can symbolize your own desire to have more of the qualities she embodied in your life – like patience, empathy, and love for others.

The person appearing in a dream may have been someone who was important to you during your life – someone who was a role model for qualities such as kindness, respectfulness, generosity, and warmth.

On the contrary, if you dream about someone with less than admirable qualities, it is more likely a reflection of your own character traits that you would like to change or improve. Perhaps you feel like you are stuck in a “dead-end” job, relationship, or life situation. It could also be a way to process the challenging and unresolved aspects of your relationship with that person.

Spiritual meaning of dreams about dead people

This type of dream might be a reflection on a few important topics in spirituality: our own mortality, impermanence in life, the fear of death, and the afterlife to name just a few.

Dreams about seeing deceased relatives may be a symbol of fear about death or denial of its inevitability. Seeing any dream character who is not alive can symbolize death. We may project our own feelings, thoughts, and desires onto a dream character and see them as having the same traits that we do ourselves.

We do not want to think about death as it is too painful or scary. We want to think of death as something that will not happen to us or affect us in any way.

The dream can sometimes be a way of disguising our fears of death and the unknown. A deceased relative in a dream may symbolize our fears that we have no control over what happens after we die.

Seeing a dead loved one in a dream can symbolize our own concerns about growing old and dying, as well as our fear of losing control over our own bodies.

Thinking beyond dream interpretation of dreams of dead people

Questions and hopes about the afterlife.

If a relative appears in your dream, you may find yourself thinking about what lies beyond death. You may have hope that you may see your loved one again after you pass away.

This type of dream may give us reassurance about the existence of an afterlife, but it also opens up a lot more questions about what happens after we die – a question central to many around the world.

Dreaming about dead people is a reminder that our time on earth is limited and we should live every day to the fullest. Death has no respect for age or status, and there is no guarantee when that final moment will come for us.

In that sense, dreams about the dead are ultimately still a reflection of your own thoughts, feelings, and desires. They may provide us with a window into unresolved issues or emotions, but they can have larger implications for the rest of your waking life.

What to do if your dream about the deceased is negative?

Even though the majority of dreams about dead loved ones are positive (according to the study), fear, loss, guilt, and anger are also common emotions in dreams of bereavement.

“In my experience, many people who have negative dreams of the deceased are having issues with their unresolved anger, guilt, etc. Additionally, the death may have been traumatic and they may be reliving that traumatic event (e.g., seeing their loved one dying again),” says Blake , a researcher specializing in grief dreams.

If you dream about the deceased and feel negative emotions, perhaps the dead person is a symbol of something you are struggling to come to terms with. It can also reflect the difficulties one may have during the process of grieving.

No matter the feelings you may have about a deceased loved one, you shouldn’t let the fear or discomfort keep you from acknowledging them. Sometimes, feeling guilty or ashamed if you dream about seeing a dead loved one is a natural reaction.

By dreaming about the dead or seeing dead friends or family members in your dreams, you are subconsciously addressing these issues and emotions within yourself.

Sometimes. the grieving process is too hard to bear alone. If you dream about seeing the deceased in your dream, you may want to seek professional help and guidance through counseling or confiding with someone you trust, which can help you deal with your emotions. Other techniques involve dream rescripting, which is a common way to turn nightmares into better dreams.

What are visitation dreams – and did you have one?

A visitation dream usually involves a deceased person appearing to the dreamer in such a vivid way that there is a felt sense of the presence of the dead, and some kind of interaction occurs that has a profound impact on the dreamer.

In a traditional sense, visitation dreams  are “where a dream figure, usually a deity or a prominent forebear, commands the dreamer to take specific actions and may predict future events.”

Visitation dreams in modern dream interpretation can be “defined as emotionally intense dreams in which a recently deceased loved one returns in the dream state to provide guidance, reassurance, and/or warning.” (Grubbs, 2004)

If you wonder if you had such a dream, check your experience against the 7 key characteristics of visitation dreams: outlined by Jennifer Shorter in her thesis “ Visitation dreams in grieving individuals “. They are: – deceased conveyed reassurance; – an internal sense of knowing, a felt sense; – message served a purpose; – complexity of intense emotion upon wakening; – changed perspective; spiritual changes; – dream affected the grieving process; – the dreamer’s message came through telepathic means.

Whether you had an actual visitation dream where your dead relative or friend visited you in the dreams is hard to tell and is still considered a controversial topic for most people. Ultimately, it is up to you what to believe.

With that said, a visitation dream is still one of the most vivid types of dreams about dead people to experience and you shouldn’t underestimate the impact it might have on your life.

Resources to help with your dream of relatives or loved ones

Here are a few books we found particularly interesting and helpful.

• Grief Dreams: How They Help Us Heal After the Death of a Loved One
• Bereavement Dreaming and the Individuating Soul
• Images of the Dead in Grief Dreams, A Jungian View of Mourning, By Susan Olson

Dream Scenarios Featuring Dead Relatives And Their Interpretation

Vivid encounters with the dead person in dreams.

In these dreams, you may be looking down at a dead body or coming face-to-face with the deceased in a very vivid dream. You may see your loved one as they looked when they were alive.

The dead person may appear in good health and normal or not at all injured or distressed. Alternatively, the person who has died may appear injured, disfigured, pale, or even ghostlike.

These dreams are common among those who have not yet come to terms with their loss. In these dreams, you will see or talk to the person who has died. You may catch a glimpse of them in your peripheral vision or they may address you directly.

Dreaming that a dead person or relative is talking to you

Sometimes, when the person in a dream appears to you, they are speaking directly to you or talking with you. Often they relay an important message that helps with the grieving process.

You may recognize their voice, but it can sometimes sound different in some way or it can seem muffled as if there was a lot of noise surrounding the two of you. The person may say anything from simple greetings such as “Hello, sweetheart” or “I’m glad you’re okay,” to giving advice or guidance.

Sometimes they may also appear as if they are guiding you in some way. The dreamer will feel as if the deceased is predicting that something bad or good is going to happen, but they do not know what it is.

This kind of dream can be a premonition or part of the grieving process, especially if the dead person is asking you to do something. This may reflect unresolved aspects of the relationship with the deceased that you must deal with before you can move on.

When a dead relative or friend talks to you in a dreams, pay attention as it can be a reflection of something that hasn’t been spoken or resolved yet. It could also mean that you are still having those thoughts and feelings.

Even if it is a dream, the message they are sending to you can be very profound. They may have information that can help you find closure or a resolution.

Dreams about a dead pet

The death of a pet is one of the most difficult life experiences people go through, especially when they are children. Many of us are so attached to our pets and we love them almost as if they were family members.

The grieving process after the death of a pet can be very similar to grieving over the death of a loved one. The dreams about deceased pets can be very powerful in helping people come to terms with loss and grief.

Dreams about a deceased are very common among people who have had a recent experience with loss. This loss could be about a death in their family or friends circle, or perhaps more symbolically, about challenging changes that may turn one’s life, career or relationships upside-down.

If you have lost a loved one, this dream might be a way of raising and processing the feelings that you have had difficulty dealing with. It can be a way to begin the grieving process. If you are dealing with radical changes in your life that feel like a loss or a “symbolic death”, your dream may also be helfpful in acknowledging your emotions.

That way, dreaming of a dead person is always a step in the direction of greater understanding, clearing, acceptance, and an encouragement to work through what needs to be processed or let go to move forward in your life.

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Find out the 10 things that happen immediately after you cross over

Erin Pavlina

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Can Deceased People Visit You Even If They’ve Crossed Over?

I was doing a reading the other day and my client asked me, “I know my mom is around me because I feel her all the time, but I’m worried because I don’t want her to be stuck here looking after me and my family when she could be enjoying Heaven. But admittedly, I don’t want her to go either because then I will be very sad. What can I do?”

There is a misconception that if a deceased person is visiting you it means they did not cross over and are maybe stuck on Earth or in limbo. This is not true.

When a person dies, they cross over. That means they leave this earthly plane and go back to the ether, or Heaven if that’s what you want to call it.

Most people cross over instantly, but some do linger for a little bit, usually if the death was so sudden that they are not quite sure they are actually dead. Some linger after a murder or accident because they feel they have unfinished business.

You can also linger a little bit if you are desperate to get back in your body. I see this with people who are in comas and then die, and I’ve seen it with celebrities like Michael Jackson who really did not want to be dead and stayed with his body for a while hoping for a miracle.

Some people will hover around their bodies for a bit before finally leaving the Earth plane and going to the other side.

But that doesn’t mean they are gone forever. A deceased person who has crossed over completely is fully capable of communicating with their living loved ones when they are ready. They don’t have to be stuck here to do it. They don’t have to be on this physical plane to “visit.”

Visiting is really about making an energetic connection between you and them. You can initiate that contact yourself by talking to your deceased loved ones or praying to them. They can initiate contact by coming to you in your dreams, knocking a picture off a wall, causing electrical disturbances in your home, or drawing your attention to something they cherished in life.

A visit just means they are communing with you. When you commune at the same time, your connection is strongest.

When we say that a deceased loved one is nearby it simply means they are reaching out to you from the other side. They are not with you ALL the time. They are with their loved ones on the other side as well.

So when you feel their energy, cherish it, but definitely don’t worry that you are holding them here or holding them up. They are likely making rounds to the living and their deceased buddies on the other side. Enjoy the visit!

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Visitation Dreams

What does a visitation from a deceased loved one in dreams mean.

Uncover Hidden Dream Meanings

Do we have a spirit watching over us? Where do our loved ones go when they die? Can they return to visit us during our sleep?

Since time began people have claimed to have seen events taking place. For example Nostradamus, Lydia Emma Pinckert and also Jeane Dixon, who both became famous by the prediction of J.F Kennedy. In these predictions spirit was suppose to have communicated through our senses: one including our sleep. My grandad died a few years ago and the dreams I have encountered about him since he passed over - are vivid and hyper intense.

I consider these “visitations dreams.” There are many types of “visitation dreams.” The spirit guiding visitation dream often crops up when we are needing advice. Encountering a visit from our beloved family is somewhat common. Grandparents often visit us in visitation dreams, and these can frequently be rather vivid to the point you might actually believe you had seen the deceased person.

Dreams of a dead loved one and what it means?

One of the most common dreams that people experience is associated with a deceased loved one.

We as "humans" live on the psychical plane and when we sleep we often sense the energy of those that have departed. The energy could be a smell such as flowers filling your bedroom, the light of sunshine in the mid of your dark bedroom. The first thing I will say to you is that spirit communicates from a love inside - and this indicates that you should have peace and happiness. If you encountered a loved one in a dream who has died then it can be a shock. Dreams can be rather strange and weird at the same time. There could be immoral acts or even breaking the law in dreams. We all have creative power when we dream and our fears and memories may occur. You are in the right place. I am going to discuss your visitation dream and what it means.

What does it mean to see someone who has died in my dream?

Spirit communicates in many ways. In dreams, we sometimes have contact from love and this indicates that you should have peace and happiness. If you encountered a loved one in a dream who has died then it can mean that they are thinking of you. The dream of spirit can be connected to our own holiness or evener own spirit in life. While I believe in spirit from the human sense, I also feel that we have a structure in the world of spirituality.

What does it mean to sense a spirit in a dream?

In dreams. there are also grounds of theological reflection in sensual images. The notion of “sensing a spirit” can occur during sleep and touch our five senses: sight, taste, touch, smell and sight.

Can the dead visit us in dreams?

Yes, according to many spiritual and occult books I have read, it’s possible that a dead loved one can visit us in our dream. Dreams of a dead loved one can be pretty intense, especially if we never got to say goodbye to the person who died. However, being visited by a loved one (who died) in your dream, doesn't mean that the person has come back to say goodbye but rather - deliver you a message, warn you about something or help you get through something. To dream of a deceased loved one means that he or she visits to provide warning, reassurance or guidance.

What if you are upset by the dream?

I know that some of you that have contacted me have been somewhat upset about the nature of these dreams. This is pure because visitation dreams can be powerful, intense, unique and sometimes - life-changing.

Is there a message?

You can be visited by your dead loved one and feel that he or she wants to deliver a message or warning to you. However, those that have crossed over normally appear in dreams when they need to communicate symbolically or telepathically rather than verbally. But this doesn’t mean that the message you need to receive will be unclear or hard to understand. You’ll be able to understand why they visited. Perhaps the dead loved one are here in order to teach you us a life lesson, to send you a warning or a reminder, or to share some sort of wisdom, or maybe life guidance.

Do dead loved ones visit us in dreams?

If you believe that dreams have a meaning, then yes, a spirit can visit us our dreams. However, most people mistake regular dreams for visitation dreams. But they aren’t the same. In visitation dreams, the spirit is usually surrounded by light and you’ll notice that they came in peace and they just want to talk or deliver a message/warning.

Also, in visitation dreams, in most cases, the deceased one tells us that he or she’s okay and peaceful, so we don’t have to worry, especially if they left without saying their final goodbye. It’s their way of letting us know that they’ve arrived on the other side safely.

Do I think spirit visits is in the night?

Sensing a spirit arises from my own experiences of being in a closed medium circle and my own spiritual passion for reformation. There is a link that is “natural” and this is on the physical and earth plane which (in religion terms) is connected to our heights of holiness.

How do we know if a loved one visited us in a dream?

As I mentioned, there’s a huge difference between normal and visitation dreams. If you have a visitation dream, trust me, you’ll know it the minute you see your deceased loved one. He/she will appear in unusual clothes or surrounded by light, or enculfed in an ultra peaceful ambiance. Also, you’ll receive a symbolic message, or sign, or something because it’s how your loved one may want to tell you he/she is still a part of your life and you don’t have to worry about them. The dreams usually occurs when you least expect it.

Is the dream good or bad?

Your loved one might visit your dream to “let you know” that they’re watching over you and are protecting you from above. On rare occasions a “dead loved one” can visit your dream to deliver a message or warn you about something. I do think you know about this and will receive a sign. It may come to you in different ways. Meaning, you’ll have to think about the “warnings” that you may find.

What are signs spirit is trying to communicate with you?

I’ll share the most common signs people receive from their dead loved ones and their meaning.

Feathers: If you see a feather in your dream or even in reality, it might be a sign from your deceased loved one. He or she is trying to tell you that they are safe and you’re ready to let go and live your life. One normally comes across a feather in your waking life when someone has departed.

Coins: If you see or receive a coin in your dream, it might be a sign from your loved one. He or she’s trying to tell you that they’ve arrived safely to the other side. Why? Well, perhaps you didn’t know but back in time, in some cultures, people placed coins on the eyes prior to burning/burying them because they believed that the deceased spirit will need the coins for the other side, so he or she could pay to be guided safely to the other side. If you see or receive a coin in your dream, perhaps your dead loved one wants you to know that he or she is well and comfortable. If you see or receive a coin in waking life too, be sure that it’s a sign from your dead loved one.

Stones: If you trip on a stone in your dream or see one, it might be a warning sign from your dead loved one. He or she’s trying to tell you that you need to open your eyes and see people for who they really are.

Also, you might walk the wrong path in life and he/she wants to send a warning sign to bring you back to the right path. You might receive a stone in your dream if your dead loved one wants to give you something that will serve you as an amulet. Different types of stones and colors hold different meanings, so you might want to remember as many details as possible when having this type of dream.

Animals: spirits use energy to reach out to us and be with us. And not surprisingly, they can reach us through animal energy. For example, you can see a bird, ladybug, butterfly, and dragonfly or some other creature in your dream state or cross your path in waking life.

Flowers: Have you ever smelt flowers suddenly! Yes, spirit does communicate through flowers. So, if you notice a flower, it might be a gift from your dead loved one. The flower is a sign from the other world. Maybe you need to bring the same flower to your deceased loved one’s grave and pay a short visitation.

People: Spirit often uses mediums to pass a message. Having such a dream can mean you need to consult tarot cards or listen to your intuition. Listen to the people around you because they might deliver an important message or warning.

What does it mean to dream of a recently deceased loved one?

When we lose someone close to us suddenly it is totally natural to dream of them over and over again. If the loved one who died left you without a goodbye, it’s possible that you will dream of him or her to make peace in your mind. Sudden death can cause so much pain to us. I can’t accept the fact that they left this world. It’s why most people dream of recently deceased loved ones. One of the most common reasons is the denial that they’re gone and not being able to accept that they will never see the person again. However, if you dream of a recently dead loved one, it’s possible that the person is trying to reach out and let you know that he or she arrived safely to the other side. If you had an unpleasant dream of the deceased loved one, for example, if he or she was struggling with something or suffering, it’s possible that they left in pain. However, they want to let you know that they’re comfortable and fine now.

How does spirit communicate through dreams?

Spirit have their ways of communicating through dreams. However, the way they communicate depends on the message they want to deliver or the reason why they are visiting. As I mentioned before, they can deliver feathers, stones, people you care for, coins, or animals to try and reach out to you. But I find their way of communicating in real life much more interesting, so I will share the most common ways deceased people communicate in waking life since I already shared how they communicate in dreams.

You can sense their presence: According to some dream experts, many people have reported that they can sense the presence of the deceased one around them after they’ve passed away. They usually feel the air moving or notice a change in the energy around. It’s a common way dead people try to communicate with the people they loved. They’re trying to stay close. However, it means that they’re still attached to the living world or the refuse to pass to the other side.

If you lost a loved one recently, and you sense a presence in the bed next to you at night, it’s possible that your dead loved one is trying to communicate. You might also feel like someone’s watching you constantly or sitting next to you in the living room or any other room in your home. However, don’t be afraid. Once your deceased loved one accepts that they’re no longer a part of the living world, they’ll pass to the other side.

Visitation = You can feel their touch

If you feel like someone’s holding your hand, or feel a sudden hug, gentle touch on your head or back during sleep, it might be spirit. He or she’s probably reaching out. He or she wants to touch you as they did before and let you know that they’re here for you.

Visitation = smell their fragrance

If you smell the fragrance of the person you lost, it’s possible that they’re trying to reach out to you or stay near to make sure you’re safe. Some people have contacted me when they smell cigar smoke, cooking, perfume or flowers.

Visitation = Unexpected electrical activity

The lights often go off and on when I get a spiritual visitation. That is if it’s in my dream or in real life. Many people are surprised to know how many people have reported unexpected electrical activity after losing a loved one. Why? Well, because most dead people use electrical devices to reach out to the people they love. If you notice things move, or channels of the TV are changed without you touching the remote, or it seems like someone’s manipulating your PC or TV, it’s possible that spirit is trying to reach out.

Visitation = You can hear their voice

If you can hear the voice of the person you lost, it’s called clairaudience. This can occur when one hears their voice internally or externally. However, hearing voices internally is more common than hearing it externally. People usually hear a voice inside their mind at times. Why? To communicate with your mind, can indicate a possible message or warning. So, listen very carefully.

Can the dead talk to us through our dreams?

As I have concluded so far, spirits can visit us in our dreams. Meaning, they can talk to us through our dreams if they feel like they have to warn us about something, send an important message or just to know we are there.

What is the dream interpretation of a visit from the deceased?

As I said before if you lost a loved one and you dream of the person, it’s possible that you’re dreaming of this “person” because you just can’t let go. If you dream of a recent loved one, you’re probably still shocked and cannot accept the fact that he/she is gone. However, it might also be a message from the person trying to tell you that he or she has finally arrived at the other side and they’re comfortable and fine right now.

In summary, if you dream of a loved one who died, it’s possible that the person’s trying to reach out and explain why he or she left, especially if they left without saying goodbye. However, it’s also possible that the spirit is trying to warn or remind you about something. Vivid dreams of a loved one who died can be pretty intense because they usually occur when you recently lost someone you loved. They can be pretty emotional and disturbing because when we lose the person we love forever, we would give anything to bring them back. However, deep inside we know there’s nothing we can do, except hope they come to us in our dreams and tell us that they’re okay and are watching over us.

How can I ask for a deceased loved one to visit me in a dream?

I get to see a loved one I lost from time to time in dreams. However, it never happens when I expect it to happen. On the contrary, it always happens when I least expect it. So the answer is yes, but expect to wait maube.

Messages in dreams from the dead:

Specific family member visitation in dreams.

It’s pretty simple to interpret a dream in which you saw a “specific” family member who died. One may say that you probably miss the person and you’re still in shock if you dreamed of a recently deceased member of your family. However, if you dream about other family members, it’s possible that the person’s trying to contact you:

Dreams about a dead mother

If you dream about your deceased mother, it’s possible that you miss her. However, it’s also possible that you’re facing an issue that asks of you to act as a mother figure. It might also mean that you’re in need of advice only a mother can give. Listen to your heart and you will hear her voice telling you what to do. Or hope she visits your dream and speaks to you directly next time. Our spirit mother normally finds ways to tell you important things. You just have to listen carefully. It’s possible that she delivers her message through feathers, stones, coins, other people or animals. They’re all signs spirit uses to contact us.

Dreams about a dead father

If you do dream about your dead father, you might feel unprotected in waking life. Perhaps you need a father’s figure in your life to guide you and protect you. However, it’s also possible that you miss your father. Or if you feel this is a dream from spirit he wants to deliver a special message. Perhaps you’re being warned about something or someone.

Dreams about a dead grandmother

Seeing your dead grandmother in your dream normally means that you miss your grandmother. However, it might also mean that someone is trying to reach out and give you an advice about something important. Often, our nana / grandmother visits our your dreams to warn or be there for you.

Dreams about a dead sister

It’s possible that you miss your sister if you dream about her. It is possible that she’s trying to contact you to let you know that she’s okay and she misses you too. Or she wants to warn you of something you’re doing but not paying close attention to.

Dreams about dead brother

If you dream about your dead brother, you probably miss him. Or he’s just trying to reach out and let you know that he always has your back, even when he’s not around.

Dreams about a dead aunt

If you dream your dead aunt, it’s possible that you may encounter a family issue that will affect your life in a negative way. However, it’s also possible that you miss your aunt.

Dreams about a dead uncle

You will probably have issues with a male figure in your life if you dreamed about your dead uncle. It might be someone with an authority in your life. However, maybe you just miss your uncle. Or he misses you too and he’s trying to reach out through your dream.

Dreams about dead cousin

If you dream about your dead cousin, you’re probably trying to avoid a family issue. However, when you face problems in life, the better things will turn out. If you were closely related to your cousin or you lost him/her recently, it’s also possible that you’re still in shock of his or her death. It might be the reason why he/she’s visiting your dreams.

Dreams about a dead wife

If you dream about your dead wife, you probably miss her and it is naturally to dream of those we deeply love. There is a possibility that she is trying to reach out and tell you that she misses you.

Dreams about a dead husband

To dream about your dead husband has the same meaning as dreaming about your wife. You either miss the person very much and you can’t let go. It can mean he is trying to reach out to let you know that he misses you too but he’s okay now. Or you have something to confess and your guilty conscience is eating you up inside. Pay attention to the details.

Dreams about a dead boyfriend or girlfriend

If you dream about your dead boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re probably still in love with the person and you miss him/her, especially if you lost him/her recently. However, if your partner died a long ago and he or she’s still visiting your dreams, it’s probably to remind you that it’s okay to be happy with someone else and move on with your life. It may also mean that he/she’s trying to warn you about something/someone dangerous.

Dreams about dead ex-lover

If you dream about your dead ex-lover, it’s possible that he or she’s still in your heart. Perhaps you did not want to end things before they passed over - and you feel like the person will never know how much you loved them. However, don’t worry because dead people know and if they want to reach out to you directly, next time, your dead ex-lover will speak to you in your dream. Or send you a sign to tell you that he or she knows how you feel. Alternatively, you might dream about your dead ex-lover if you have a guilty conscience.

Summary of visitations in a dream

As we concluded so far, it’s possible to communicate with the people we lost in our dreams. However, we have to pay close attention to how they communicate and what message they’re trying to deliver. It’s possible that we dream about dead loved ones if we recently lost the person and we can’t move on because of the shock. However, it’s also possible that the person we lost is trying to tell us that we have nothing to worry about. If one senses their presence or feels their touch or even hears their voice in waking life, it’s possible that they’re trying to reach out to you specifically.

Most dreams reflect our experiences and events that have taken place in the days. However, visitation dreams are normal helpful insights into the relationship of those that have crossed over. These dreams call attention because of their anomalous quality and they also seem meaningful. If your dream impacts your life and is am exceptional human experience then this can have a significant impact on your life.

By Florance Saul Feb 2, 2019

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The Dead Don’t Hurt Ending, Explained: What Happens to Vivienne in This Subversive Western?

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What is the dead don't hurt about, the inciting event in vivienne's life, what happens to vivienne at the end of the dead don't hurt.

Viggo Mortensen wrote, directed, produced, and starred in the throwback Western The Dead Don't Hurt , a passionate labor of love that paid off. Set in 19th-century San Francisco and Nevada, the story concerns Vivienne Le Coudy (Vicky Krieps), a French Canadian settler adapting to life on the harsh American frontier during the Civil War. Vivienne meets and falls for Danish settler Holger Olsen (Mortensen) and the two begin life anew together.

Alas, when Olsen fights for the North in the Civil War , Vivienne faces an unspeakable horror that alters the course of her life. The Dead Don't Hurt has received positive reviews for Krieps' powerful performance, Mortensen's deft ability to flip genre conventions, and for pulling no punches in its brutal depiction of America's westward expansion. However, a few confusing plot points in the final act have left certain fans wondering what happened at the end of The Dead Don't Hurt and what its final moments mean for Vivienne and Holger.

The Dead Don't Hurt (2023)

Read our review

The Dead Don't Hurt is an acclaimed Western that begins in San Francisco in the 1860s. A French-Canadian pioneer woman, Vivienne Le Coudy, arrived from the North looking for a better life. In San Francisco, a wealthy French art collector (Colin Morgan) courts Vivienne and offers her a life of luxury. To underscore her rebellious spirit, Vivienne distances herself from the art collector, eventually falling in love with the rugged outdoorsman Holger Olsen, a Danish immigrant who later joins the Union Army and fights for the North in the American Civil War.

Told non-linearly, the nontraditional movie Western depicts Vivienne's tragic fate in the second scene and reverse engineers her story from there. Viewers are informed from the beginning that Vivienne dies at the end of her story , with Mortensen flashing backward and forward to fill in the gaps of her tragic frontier life. Yet, before detailing what took her life, a few key plot elements bear closer examination. After evading the art collector's aggressive advances, Vivienne agrees to travel along with Holger to his secluded Nevada cabin. Independent and self-reliant as they come, Vivienne refuses to marry Holger despite genuinely loving him.

In Nevada, Vivienne gets a job as a bartender in a town called Elk Flats. The town is controlled by Alfred Jeffries (Garrett Dillahunt) and his drunk, sadistic son Weston (Solly McLeod). Vivienne is left alone when the Civil War breaks out and Holger leaves to fight for the North. In Holger's absence, Vivienne experiences an unthinkable tragedy that changes her life forever.

After Holger leaves for the war, Vivienne continues her duties in the Elk Flats saloon. The alcoholic and violent Weston Jeffries attacks Vivienne when she is alone and brutally rapes her . The devastating incident results in Vivienne's pregnancy. Despite being uncertain of the child's father's identity, Vivienne decides to keep it and raise it alone . As viewers are left to wonder if Holger or Weston is the father of Vivienne's son, Vivienne compartmentalizes her trauma and raises the boy with love and compassion.

Viggo Mortensen’s 20 Best Movies, Ranked by Rotten Tomatoes

Viggo Mortensen may forever be known as Aragorn, but the New York City native has built a decades-long career that's pretty impressive.

The movie jumps five years ahead when Holger returns from battle. Holger meets Vivienne's son, Vincent, and wonders if the boy belongs to him. Vivienne explains her horrific encounter with Weston, prompting Holger to lash out in a vengeful rage. Holger sets out to confront Weston, but Vivienne informs him that Weston has been run out of town for serial murder. Resigned to the news, Holger, Vivienne, and Vincent live together on the frontier for a while, enjoying peaceful tranquility for the most part. The tender moments of fleeting bliss lead to more tragedy for Vivienne in the final act.

The family's brief moments of happiness are sapped when Vivienne suddenly falls ill and eventually dies. A doctor arrives and attributes the cause of death to syphilis, a disease she likely contracted from Weston . Following her tragic demise, Holger and Vincent track Weston down in the woods and mortally injure him. After leaving Weston for dead in the wild, Holger and Vincent ride as far West as they can until they find the Pacific Ocean. It is implied that Holger will raise Vincent as his son, despite the mystery of his parentage. In many ways, it does not matter if Holger or Weston fathered Vincent. Holger and Vivienne treated the boy as their blood-related kin every step of the way, with both Krieps and Mortensen delivering knockout performances .

Viggo Mortensen and Jane Campion Sit Down for a Director-on-Director Chat About The Dead Don't Hurt

Filmmaker Jane Campion has a conversation with Viggo Mortensen about his film The Dead Don't Hurt, in theaters now from Shout! Studios.

Despite the harrowing tragedy Vivienne experienced, she rose to the occasion and raised Vincent as a loving mother , regardless of who his father was. Her body was violated, her innocence was stripped, and her dignity and humility were robbed. Yet, at no point does Vivienne resent Vincent or treat him like an illegitimate child. On the contrary, Vivienne somehow finds the strength and wisdom to raise Vincent as if he were Holger's son born out of love.

It's an incredible tale of resilience in the face of traumatizing abuse, proving that Vivienne acted with selfless heroism that defined her story more than anything else. Although her death is revealed to viewers in the movie's second scene, the how and why of it all paints a portrait of a strong-willed and independent-minded woman unwilling to let one tragic incident inform her family's future. Vivienne may be dead, but she refuses to let Weston's actions hurt Vincent's well-being.

The Dead Don't Hurt is currently playing in select theaters.

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What is ‘Blood and Cheese’ in ‘House of the Dragon’? The brutal death in the Season 2 premiere, explained

🚨 Warning: This story has spoilers for the Season Two premiere of "House of the Dragon."

The kids are not all right in “House of the Dragon.”

The Season One finale episode from 2022 ended with the death of a child. Now, in the Season Two premiere of the HBO series — a prequel to “Game of Thrones” — concluded with another jarring murder done in the spirit of an eye for an eye. Or, as Daemon Targaryen (Matt Smith) puts it, “A son for a son.”

This storyline — nicknamed “Blood and Cheese” after the two assassins who carried out the murder — is one of the most brutal in George R. R. Martin’s “Game of Thrones” books, and was long-dreaded by those familiar.

More "House of the Dragon" stories

• The Blacks vs. Greens in 'House of the Dragon,' explained: Who has the edge?
• 'House of the Dragon' Season 1 recap: Everything to know before revisiting Westeros for Season 2
• 'House of the Dragon' kids: Meet Rhaenyra, Daemon and Alicent's children

“House of the Dragon” is set nearly 200 years before the events of “Game of Thrones” and follows a civil war over succession that shaped the landscape HBO viewers knew and loved from the original show.

On one side are supporters of Queen Rhaenyra (Emma D’Arcy), known as the Blacks, who believe her father, the late King Viserys, intended his firstborn to be his successor, as he commanded when she was a child. On the other are the Greens, those who believe Viserys’ son with Alicent Hightower (Olivia Cooke), Aegon II (Tom Glynn-Carney), is the rightful heir.

The murder of Rhaenyra’s second son, Lucerys Velaryon (Elliot Grihault), carried out by Viserys and Alicent’s second son, Aemond (Ewan Mitchell), in the Season One finale is widely considered the start of the Dance of the Dragons, or the civil war. It’s the culmination of a yearslong rivalry that began when Lucerys blinded Aemond in one eye in a fight.

So here’s how one child murder sets the show up for another.

What happens to Jaehaerys Targaryen? Explaining 'Blood and Cheese'

In this Season Two premiere episode, which picks up shortly after Aemond killed Lucerys, the Greens are aware that an attack could be coming. Alicent says she wants Vhagar, Aemond’s dragon, home to deter Rhaenyra from attacking in retribution from the death of her son.

Alicent’s instincts are right. Daemon, Rhaenyra’s husband (and uncle — if you know, you know), is initially targeting Aemond. Plus, Rhaenyra, after discovering the remains of her son, declares, “I want Aemond Targaryen.”

So how does Aemond wind up alive and young Jaehaerys Targaryen brutally murdered?

It starts when Daemon recruits assassins to carry out the slaying of Aemond.

First, a spy named Mysaria (Sonoya Mizuno), who goes by the White Worm and is also Daemon’s former lover, connects him to a former butcher-turned guard, nicknamed Blood. Then he recruits a rat catcher, nicknamed Cheese, who has a knowledge of the palace’s tunnels. In exchange, Daemon promises Mysaria a way out of King’s Landing and the rat catcher enough money to pay off his debts.

Cheese asks Daemon, “What if we can’t find (Aemond)?”

The answer becomes clear when Blood and Cheese enter the Red Keep, and neither knows where to find a royal.

They head upstairs to where the royal family lives, and as Blood goes from empty room to empty room, he encounters a handmaid and pretends to be a rat catcher. Meanwhile, Cheese finds Helaena (Phia Saban), Aegon’s wife (and sister), in a room with her two children.

Their target suddenly changes from Aemond to Jaehaerys, Aegon and Helaena’s oldest son who’s only 6.

As Aegon’s heir, Jaehaerys had attended a Small Council meeting earlier in the episode. Aegon makes the environment decidedly uncomfortable when he nearly forces the Master of Coin to let Jaehaerys ride him “like a steed” before Alicent stops him. Jaehaerys is dismissed. The next time we see the 6-year-old, he’s sleeping in bed, not knowing his fate.

At knifepoint, Blood and Cheese force Helaena to indicate which of her children is the oldest son and heir. She tries to give them a necklace instead but is rejected.

Finally, she points to one of her children. Blood doubts she’s truthfully pointing to the heir, but Cheese believes her. They cover the young boy’s mouth to muffle his screaming.

As the assassins murder her son, Helaena flees with her other child. The scene may be less bloody than the famous slaughter of the Red Wedding in “Game of Thrones,” but the sound of knives at work is just as gruesome.

The episode ends with Helaena at Alicent’s bed, telling her what has just happened: “They killed the boy.”

Differences between 'Blood and Cheese' in the book and the show

The “Blood and Cheese” scene in George R. R. Martin’s 2018 novel “Fire & Blood” has a few details the show leaves out.

Daemon, as in the show, puts his vengeance into motion by hiring Blood and Cheese to do his bidding. But in the book, Helaena and her children are the target from the start. Blood and Cheese wait for Helaena and her three children to appear (in the show, she’s with two). This means the children are awake for the ordeal, whereas in the show they are asleep.

Blood and Cheese tell Helaena they want just one son and demand her to choose. At first, she asks them to take her.

“Cheese warned the queen to make a choice soon, before Blood grew bored and raped her little girl,” Martin writes.

Helaena ultimately picks Maelor, her youngest son. The book tries to give insight into her decision.

“Perhaps she thought the boy was too young to understand, or perhaps it was because the older boy, Jaehaerys, was King Aegon’s firstborn son and heir, next in line to the Iron Throne,” the book reads.

Cheese then whispers to Maelor, “You hear that, little boy? Your momma wants you dead.” But he ultimately kills Jaehaerys with a “single blow.”

The book describes Helaena’s descent after the death of her son. She’s unable to care for herself, nor look after Maelor, the son she condemned to death. Alicent raises Maelor while Helaena sinks “deeper and deeper into madness.” Meanwhile, the king “raged, and drank, and raged.”

Blood, in the book, is found, tortured and “allowed to die” after 13 days. Cheese was never found.

Helaena saw this coming with her prophecy

From Season One, Helaena seems to know something bad is coming. Like other Targaryens, Helaena has prophetic sight.

In the eighth episode of Season One, Helaena fears the “beast beneath the boards,” which could describe a rat.

She echoes a fear of rats in the Season Two premiere. “I’m afraid,” she tells Aegon, who replies that the dragons won’t harm her. She’s not afraid of the dragons, she says, but “the rats.”

Elena Nicolaou is a senior entertainment editor at Today.com, where she covers the latest in TV, pop culture, movies and all things streaming. Previously, she covered culture at Refinery29 and Oprah Daily. Her superpower is matching people up with the perfect book, which she does on her podcast, Blind Date With a Book.

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